by Lisa Brady
It’s been quite some time since The Cleavers came to us once a week to share their life lessons and morals. Over 50 years, in fact. A lot has changed since 1957. Segregation was ended, women are prevalent (and kicking ass) in the workplace and the typical family ideal seems to have fallen by the wayside. Some would argue the merits of moving past the stuffy, goody-two-shoes, so-sweet-it-makes-your-teeth-hurt family moment, but I have to ask: is it really so terrible?
Sure, Wally and The Beav got into “trouble” on a regular basis and by the end of 30 minutes, they were sitting down to a home cooked meal and chuckling about the days’ hijinks. That’s not reality, is it? Though it seems unlikely that this was happening in the average white-picket-fence-2.5-kids household, there are some elements to it that aren’t all that bad.
[Jules in Measure Up]
– Family dinner: nowadays it seems like the concept of family dinner mostly takes place in front of the television while the kids are holed up in their rooms, on the internet or texting about the latest gossip (scrunchies are SOOO in right now! {that is COMPLETELY false – put down the scruchy!}) or is minus a parent who is working late. Either way it seems rare these days that a family, with all it’s members, sits down at a table and spends time together. I am the first to admit that kids need their space and shouldn’t be smothered, but sitting down to a meal together hardly qualifies. Get TiVo.
– Sharing conversations: with all of the commercials you see today about how important it is for parents to talk to their kids (drugs, sex, cigarettes, looking at porn) you would think that there would be rampant communicating going on. When I was young my mom had all the talks with me (see above – minus the porn talk) and though I may not have always listened to her (kids will be kids) I know that she cared enough to want to protect me. I will try and do the same if I have kids someday. Especially the cautionary tale about scruchies. Yuck.
– Cause and effect: the working concept for Leave it to Beaver was that the kids would get into some sort of (completely benign) trouble, like skipping school or fibbing to the teach, but at the end they always got caught and were always held responsible for their actions. I think this element of parenting is grossly overlooked these days. Based on what I see in the grocery stores, a lot of kids are allowed to do whatever they want or say whatever they want without fear of ramifications. I stole a mood ring once and when my parents found out they made me go to the store and tell the clerk and then I was grounded for an extended period of time. I can tell you I never shoplifted again. Now I realize this isn’t going to work for every kid, but that doesn’t mean parents shouldn’t try at all. It’s a life lesson that you need to be accountable for your actions and that was something Ward and June were teaching their kids on a weekly basis.
Times, they are a changin’. That’s just reality. It can’t be the same world today that it was in 1957, nor do I think it should be. But progress at the sacrifice of what once was considered the family unit isn’t necessarily progress. So, the next time you are sitting down for dinner in the family room instead of the dining room, or your letting you child kick and scream in the middle of the cereal aisle, think about the Cleavers; what would America’s favorite idealized family do?
