Doing It With Tara: Chocolate Bacon Frosting!11

by Tara Diane

So before you say “what the fuckkkkk” at the idea of chocolate bacon cupcakes, just hear me out.  A while back I bought this chocolate bar for my then-boyfriend.  It was basically one of those I-am-buying-this-for-you-but-really-it’s-for-me things.  Anyways, it was DELICIOUS.  For realsies!  So I made it a mission to make up a good bacon cupcake.  Also, someone just told me they had bacon maple cupcakes on Cupcake Wars, so the idea can’t be THAT bad.

This recipe is strictly for frosting.  I am really bad at making up cake recipes.  I have yet to find an amazing chocolate cupcake recipe, so for this we are using (gasp) regular old chocolate box cake mix.  If anyone has a good chocolate cake recipe, send it my way!!

What you’ll need:

•    Dash of vanilla
•    Four cups powdered sugar
•    Half pint whipping cream
•    Twelve ounces semi-sweet or bittersweet chocolate chips
•    Half teaspoon salt
•    Two tablespoons drip coffee (optional)
•    10-15 pieces of bacon (if they’re small then 15, if they’re big then 10)

At this point, I am assuming that you have already made your chocolate cupcakes.  Following the directions on the box is not very complicated, so you should have managed that on your own :].  This is JUST a frosting recipe!  Also, you don’t need to have a mixer to make this.  A whisk should work just fine for mixing, your arm just might get a little tired.

1.  Pour your whipping cream into a bowl and heat it in the microwave.  You will want to heat it in thirty-second intervals until warm, about three or four times.  Pour the warm cream into your mixer.

2.  Put chocolate chips into a bowl and heat in the microwave, also in thirty-second intervals… also about three or four times, until melted.  Pour the melted chocolate chips into the mixer and turn on low.  Also, please don’t feed your fat pets chocolate chips.
3.  Add a dash of vanilla to the mixer.  If you are super anal, just say half a teaspoon.
4.  Add in half a teaspoon of salt.
5.  This is optional, but adding two tablespoons of drip coffee can really make the flavor pop.  If you don’t have any coffee brewed at the moment it’s not a big deal, it just makes them EXTRA good if you add it.
5.  One cup at a time, put in your powdered sugar.  Four cups total.  At this point, make sure all ingredients are thoroughly mixed together.

6.  Chop up your 15ish pieces of COOKED (I shouldn’t have to say that, but just in case…) bacon as finely as you can.  Once it is chopped to your satisfaction, throw it into to mixer.  Mine could have been chopped up a little bit more in this batch.  If that picture doesn’t gross you out, something is wrong with you.
7.  Mix for a minute, then let the frosting sit for about half an hour.  This is to let it firm up a bit (since you melted the chocolate), but also to let the bacon flavors get all sexual with the chocolate flavors.  Brown chicken brown cow.
8.  Frost up them cupcakes, yo!

Operation fat kid, complete!

P.S.  I know there are a ton of vegan and vegetarian SG readers, and I apologize for excluding you!  My next recipe will have a 100% chance of being vegetarian and 70ish% chance of being vegan.  Sorry, healthy people :[.