by Brett Warner

My younger brother used to play softball and during the games, I would wander about the nearby train tracks or bum around in the small playground. (My main concern that summer was whether Agent Mulder could really be dead — he wasn’t, though in retrospect it might have been wiser for my then favorite show to go out while it was still ahead.) One day, there was another young kid on the swing set and he had this small, red, egg-shaped video game on a key chain. It had a funny name and my fifth grade eyes glazed over as he explained how the thing worked. “These are gonna be the next Beanie Babies,” he promised. I think I probably told him that was stupid. Shows what I know.

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by Angelita

I won’t lie, I love vampires. I’ve read all of Anne Rice’s vampire novels, watched just about every vampire movie there is, even all the lame 80’s ones, and I’m still slightly convinced vampires could possibly exist. However, the world seems hell bent on ruining this little internal pleasure of mine. 

First, they made Vampires teen-friendly, which is just the epitome of lame. What the hell kind of vampire wants to spend eternity going to high school?

If that wasn’t bad enough, now vampires are pro-abstinence. A pro-abstinence vampire is an oxymoron; vampires survive via penetration and sucking. If that’s not sexual, I don’t know what is. Then, vampires came out of the coffin and became mainstream on True Blood. So now I have to share a common interest with screeching preteens AND their parents.

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by Desiree Marsau

“Don’t wear white after Labor Day.” Not only is it the stupidest rule of fashion ever written, it’s also the most outdated. Forget what your Grandmother told you. White is hot all year round and it’s also the easiest way to make a vintage wardrobe feel a little more modern. Add some crisp white and it always brings a sleek edge to whatever you are wearing.

Hours spent researching WHY this ever became a rule of fashion in the first place kept leading me back to one main reason: season. White deflects sunlight, therefore white is not warm enough to wear in the winter. I call B.S. To wear white in the winter simply wear heavier fabrics or knits, solid shoes or boots rather than strappy sandals, or pair lightweight garments with heavier garments like cardigans or woolly tights. Stick with heavy cotton, wool, cashmere, down, leather and most other natural fibers for the best protection from the elements.

I am, of course, biased towards vintage clothing so I pulled together a few examples of extra cute white vintage garments for you to check out.

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by Bob Suicide

Geeks in general are often characterized as the archetypal introverted boy: thick plastic-rimmed glasses, suspenders, and high-waisted pants.

(Sounds pretty hot to me!)

Just look at Crispin Glover’s talented portrayal of stammering and painfully timid George McFly. We’re the ones who stand in the corner of the dance hall; afraid to talk to girls. In movies like this, nerds rarely “get the girl” without some sort of “coolness” makeover to bring us up to speed with popular culture.

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July Suicide in Almost Golden

• INTO: I like riding my bike, pie, fermentation, tattoos, sleeping with the windows open, pampering myself, selling panties, gardening, books, dancing, sourdough bread, clean rooms, getting lost, finding my way, making things, eating things, going places
• NOT INTO: poor lighting, drugs, animal abuse, drugs, elitist attitudes, taking the easy way out
• MAKES ME HAPPY: Pie, Rain, Autumn, Pain, Gardens, Dogs, Cats, traveling the world, good coffee, calling home, tea, watching things grow
• MAKES ME SAD: Poor Communication, Citrus, Animals peeing on my stuff, Itchy tattoos, bad coffee, tourists, consumerism,
• HOBBIES: Wandering the Planet, Books, Gardens, Bikes, Selling Panties
• 5 THINGS I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT: Things do not define me and therefore I can live without them. I just wont like it much.
• VICES: Candy, food, travel, books, coffee, kissing
• I SPEND MOST OF MY FREE TIME: trying to figure out where the hell I am, wondering what Im doing with my life, making plans and wasting time.

Get to know July better over at SuicideGirls.com!