This Thursday May 23rd on SuicideGirls Radio our special guest is the gorgeous and super talented singer, songwriter, DJ and producer, Charissa Saverio, a.k.a. DJ Rap. She’ll be joined in studio by hilarious guest host Jessica Sattelberger, who is making her mark on LA’s standup circuit and currently co-hosts Dave Navarro’s Dark Matter show on Playboy Radio. The lovely Juturna Suicide, who has just returned from a wild and wicked Vegas trip, will occupying the co-host chair.
You can listen – and watch – the world’s leading naked radio show live on Thursday nights from 6 til 8 PM at our new state-of-the-art all digital home: TradioV.com/LA.
If you have questions for the SG Radio crew or our guests, you can call in during the live broadcast at: 1-855-TRV-inLA (1-855-878-4652)
For updates on all things SG Radio-related, like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter.
About DJ Rap
Charissa Saverio, a.k.a. DJ Rap, has been the undisputed queen of the turntables and voted the number one female DJ in the world! DJ Rap has infiltrated the music industry with her arsenal of talent. She has established herself as the CEO of her labels: Propa and Impropa Talent, and developed her creative direction as a full-fledged producer. She is also a classically trained pianist and songwriter, amongst many other talents. Rap has dominated such genres as house and drum & bass. However, her love for music has taken her through many reflections of genres and musical experiences. Ultimately, millions in a global capacity have embraced her and her music. Over the course of DJ Rap’s career she has collaborated and worked with many talented and influential professionals. Such talents consist of BT, Eric Morrillo, Hans Zimmer, Hybid, and DJ Tydi, to name just a few. Rap has produced music for Playstation, Wii, and seven major motion pictures.
**UPDATE**
ICYMI: Here’s the recording of last week’s show feat. DJ Rap and special guest host Jessica Sattelberger – plus an update on the Weev / CFAA case from Nicole Powers.
Iron Man 3 has already grossed over a billion dollars. Pulling in roughly $285 million here in the states, it’s overseas that Iron Man 3 has been a real hit. International sales have passed $664 million dollars. Iron Man premiered a week early overseas, and it played in 79% of the foreign markets. In its first weekend internationally, it grossed over $198 million, beating the Avengers record. Domestically, Iron Man had the second biggest opening weekend ever bringing in $174 million, behind the Avengers ($204 million). But, despite the massive numbers, Iron Man 3 has been met with incredibly mixed reviews.
Marvel and Disney are raking in a fortune with these superhero movies, and now the heroes want a bigger piece of the pie. Iron Man actor, Robert Downey Jr. is currently renegotiating with Disney. He’s not the only actor wanting a larger pay day, many of the Avengers actors are seeking to renegotiate before signing on for Avengers 2. While the cast is seeking more money from the movies, director Joss Whedon has posted a blog on his site to correct some misinformation about his own payday for the Avengers.
I was going to let it slide, but I’ve got this sour taste in my mouth. (Mmmm, lemonade!). Some facts are not facts. I’m not going to go into the whole thing, but jeepers, I’m not getting $100 mil on Avengers 2. If I were, I would come on this site and laugh and laugh and laugh. I’m not making Downey money. I’m making A LOT, which is exciting. I’m not pretending to be a poor farmer, an Everyman, an ANYman. But that number is nuts. A few other things about me that have been “reported” that people should take with a grain of salt:
That I throw wild Hollywood parties where everyone is naked and dancing and wild and I remember to serve enough snacks.
That I can get a movie greenlit by sighing and staring into the middle distance.
That I ate a unicorn and made it winter for three years.
That I “can write.”
Well, that’s a load off. Sorry to get so personal — the whole thing’s a bit tawdry. But honestly, it bugged me. I’m off for a nice juicy steak. There’s a place downtown that does it with rosemary butter, it tastes just like unico — like a steak.
BYE-ee! J.
Avengers 2 might be having some negotiating trouble with old members, but Marvel’s plans moving forward also include a new lineup. Rumor is that Whedon is seeking to write the Scarlet Witch and her twin brother Quicksilver in to Avengers 2, and there are whispers that Marvel is looking to cast Saoirse Ronan in the role of Scarlet Witch. Whether Saoirse gets the part or not, the helps to give us an idea of the kind of actress they have in mind.
The new Marvel series, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. is set to go. The first teaser trailer has been released ending with a reminder #CoulsonLives. The series core cast has been filled out, and Clark Gregg is returning as Agent Coulson. Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. is set to premier in the coming fall season.
A new trailer for Thor: The Dark World has been released as Marvel moves forward with their ‘Phase 2’. Thor 2 premiers in November of this year. Captain America is the next movie up after Thor, and Captain America will be joined by some classic heroes for the journey. Anthony Mackie will be playing the Falcon and is set to be in more than half the movie. Robert Redford will also be filling a major role as S.H.I.E.L.D. Agent Alexander Pierce. The most exciting rumor of Marvel’s casting during ‘Phase 2’ however, is that the tenth Doctor Who, David Tennant may be cast as the gun blazing master tactician Rocket Raccoon.
As Doctor Who moves toward their 50th Anniversary, a new executive producer has been found for the show. Brian Minchin, who has worked in the past on the UK Torchwood, will be taking the role of executive producer, working alongside show frontrunner Steven Moffat.
Star Trek: Into Darkness is moving into theaters this week. The very suspenseful third and final trailer was released for the film. Finally, the great debate over which Spock would win between Nimoy and Quinto is over. It’s embedded inside a commercial trying to sell Audi’s, but it’s nevertheless well worth the watch.
Ender’s Game is moving into theaters on the first of November this year. The first full length trailer for the movie has been released and is appropriately narrated by Harrison Ford. The film was directed by Gavin Hood and stars Asa Butterfield as the title character, Ender.
Comedy Central has a new late night talk show starring the Nerdists’ Chris Hardwick. The show is being co-produced by Funny or Die and will be filling the air slot immediately after The Colbert Report.
“I know something of the life that this man lives in this film,” says Pierce Brosnan when asked what attracted him to Love Is All You Need. It’s without doubt his most personal role to date. He plays a character very different from the cool, calm, and collected men of action that dominate his résumé, which includes the title role in the TV series Remington Steele, and leads in movies such as Dante’s Peak, The Thomas Crown Affair and The Tailor of Panama, as well as a four-film stint as James Bond in Goldeneye, Tomorrow Never Dies, The World Is Not Enough, and Die Another Day.
Though still suave and sophisticated, in Love Is All You Need Brosnan’s character Philip is very vulnerable beneath his expensive suits and default crabby demeanor. Philip is an English businessman isolated by geography in Denmark, and cut off from love due to the untimely and sudden death of his wife. As a coping mechanism, he divorces himself from his emotions and thrusts himself into his work running an international fruit and vegetable import/export empire. However, on the way to his son’s wedding at a picturesque but neglected Italian villa, surrounded by orange and lemon groves, that he once shared with his late wife, love literally and metaphorically crashes into Philip’s life.
The somewhat chaotic Ida, played with extreme candor and subtlety by Danish actress Tinre Dyrholm, is the last thing Philip wants in his well-ordered and controlled world. But she is everything he needs. They bump into each other when Ida reverses her beat up car into Philip’s pristine one in an airport parking lot. As they exchange information, to their mutual horror and embarrassment, they realize they are both en route to the same wedding since Ida is the mother of the bride.
Ida’s vulnerabilities are far less well concealed than Philip’s. Indeed her wig is knocked off when her car’s airbag inflates, revealing a scalp left hairless due to the rigors of chemotherapy. But hair – and a breast – are not the only losses Ida’s recently endured. Her husband has also just walked out on her, and into the arms of a younger woman. As a result, Ida is barely able to keep it together as she suffers the weight of Philip’s frustration and scorn. But her kindness, dignity, and cheerful spirit in the face of adversity prevail, chipping away the stone that encases Philip’s heart.
Though dealing with the grim realities of breast cancer in an unusually honest way, the film — which was directed by Academy Award-winning Danish filmmaker Susanne Bier and produced by Vibeke Windeløv, who has worked extensively with Dogme director Lars von Trier — is very much a celebration of life and love. The two central characters ultimately come to terms with their respective losses, and find a way to move past them, and it’s this aspect that resonates deeply with Brosnan’s own experience.
The Irish born actor lost his first wife, Cassandra Harris, after a four-year battle with ovarian cancer in 1991. She was just 43. Like Philip, Brosnan eventually allowed himself to love again, and married journalist Keely Shaye Smith after a 7 year courtship in 2001. The couple have now been together for over 19 years and tirelessly campaign to raise awareness and money for environmental causes and women’s healthcare issues.
I met up with Brosnan at the Regent Beverly Wilshire hotel, to talk about Love Is All You Need, which is in theaters now.
Nicole Powers: You must have been at this all day.
Pierce Brosnan: I have actually. All day, all yesterday, all week, but it’s good, because the film is a beautiful film.
NP: I was just going to say how beautiful it was. It’s a very unusual love story too, because it’s not just about the transformative power of love, it’s about the transformative power of a little honesty and a lot of kindness.
PB: It is. You’re absolutely right in that regard. It is about kindness, it is about affairs of the heart, it’s about the humanity of people’s lives who are mangled by love or by their own infidelities. It’s also about a woman who’s dealing with the rigors and the stress of breast cancer and trying to cleave her way through the healing of that, and a man, like myself, who is dormant within his own widowdom. That’s the power and the glory of Susanne Bier, she’s a really fantastic writer, a fantastic director.
NP: I love the brave choices she made. I mean, there’s the traditional Hollywood portrayal of cancer, but she chose not to take that route. There’s a particularly powerful bathing scene where you actually see…
PB: Her breast.
NP: And her wound. And that was important, to see that and have that honesty in the portrayal.
PB: Yes. I think it’s one of the most gorgeous scenes in the movie. I think it’s probably the epicenter of the movie. You see the vulnerability of this magnificent woman played by Trine Dyrholm. You see the joy away from the pain of cancer [as she’s] just bathing in these gorgeous waters – naked and abandoned to life. Then he thinks she’s drowning, it’s very tender and really beautifully done. It was an amazing setting to play the scene out in, and to see Trine do it with such courage and be naked. It’s not easy to be naked and have a camera on your as well.
NP: I also think it was a very courageous film for you to take on, because it must have brought back some painful memories from your past.
PB: It was come the day for the memories to go there, to go back to the loss of a wife that you loved, to go back and touch into that space and time and heart. But one does that in many different ways in your work. That’s what the job and the art of acting is, to go back to places that you don’t necessarily want to go back to and to bring them alive. That’s the challenge. And if you have a piece like this that is so supportive for those memories, and you have a director like Susanne Bier, who’s directing you through the piece, then you can surrender to it. And you have actors like Trine before you who make you real.
NP: Yes, she’s incredible. When you first saw the script what attracted you to it?
PB: Because I could identify with the emblems that were in this character’s life. Losing a wife, being a single parent, being a widower, being, not necessarily a workaholic — because I do like to do work. I love working, I love acting, and it’s what I do.
NP: And finding love again?
PB: And finding love again, I knew about that. I’ve got a great girl, a great woman who’s my North Star, 19 years together going down the road. So, you know, I know something of the life that this man lives in this film. It’s about faith, new beginnings, all in the celebration of a wedding. Everyone can identify with a wedding. It’s the bringing together of two families, it’s a bringing together of a man and a woman, a boy and a girl, their love in the eyes of god. So there’s all of that ceremony that is timeless, generation after generation. And then the crazy, madcap world within that, when they clash and the alcohol flows, and the music flows and the resentments come out and people really begin to show themselves.
NP: The whole thing with family is that you have to love them despite their flaws.
PB: Yeah, you do. Because we’re all cracked and fractured, that’s love and only love really. It’s the essence of being human, being kind with whatever you do — writing, painting, being a dentist or being an accountant or whatever — I think it’s to be kind, to be loving.
NP: How long did you get to spend in Italy? The location was stunning.
PB: We spent just over a month there. It was amazing. It was just fabulous. Sorrento is a gorgeous part of the Italian coastline.
NP: I went on vacation there. It was the best trip I’ve ever had in my entire life. And seeing that villa set amongst the orange and lemon groves made me want smell-o-vision, because it must have smelt good.
PB: Oh, it was mighty, it was really, really unbelievable. I had the time of my life. It’s a film that I will carry in my heart forever and a day, because of the nature of it. Then that it’s there on film, that Morten [Søborg], the DP, captured it in such glorious color. And to wake up every day and go to work. And Vibeke [Windeløv], one of the producers on the film, who’s a very charismatic lady. She found a villa for me, so I lived in the Villa Tritone, which was down the back streets. Do you remember when you were there, you could go down the back streets of Sorrento, down to the little village, the little bay? Well, as you go down that avenue, just before you get to the Saracens’ Gate, if you remember that, where the Saracens came through all those centuries ago, on the right there were green gates, and there was the Villa Tritone. So I stayed in this villa. Vibeke made a deal with the lovely owners. I stayed there, and then consequently all the cast and crew could come in — because they wanted to have James Bond in their house. [laughs] God love ‘em! God bless ‘em! [Puts on thick Irish accent] I’m just an actor. There you go, let’s party guys!
NP: This movie, and Mamma Mia, which is also set in a Mediterranean surrounding and centered around a wedding, made me realize that Europeans know how to eat, drink, and be merry, in a way that…
PB: Americans do, Americans do as well.
NP: But the lushness of the land, and the connection of it to the wine and the produce on the table…
PB:: Well, there is that old worldliness to it — that’s what’s so beguiling and captivating. These films are like bookends, Mamma Mia and this one. They sit there like bookends on the shelf. Because both are surrounded by the epicenter of a wedding.
NP: Did the locals enjoy the fact that James Bond was staying in their town? Were there any particularly funny moments with the locals while you were in Sorrento?
PB: Erm… Yes, but I can’t really talk about the one that comes to mind. [laughs] It involves… Oh no, I couldn’t. You’ll have to read the memoirs for that one. [laughs]
NP: [laughs] Damn, that’s a tease!
PB: It’s a tease, isn’t it? No, not really. I wondered around and, you know, the locals… I’d get out and about and I’d go to church Sundays, because the churches are everywhere, on every corner, and they’re so magnificent and such a celebration of faith. And the food was fantastic. I met a family who had a boat, so some days I’d just go around the coast and down the coast of the Amalfi.
NP: Ah, the Amalfi Coast.
PB: It was just around the corner, literally.
NP: Yeah, I took a bus trip along the coastal cliff road, and the bus was so long and the corners were so sharp it felt like we were going to plunge over the edge at times.
PB: Yeah, best not to look too closely. That opening scene with us in the car, that was all along the Amalfi Coast. I don’t know how the hell we managed to do it but we did… But it was an embarrassment of riches.
NP: Well your career’s almost been an embarrassment of riches. I mean you got a big break early on when Tennessee Williams handpicked you to be in the UK premiere of his play [The Red Devil Battery Sign], and then you’ve work with Roman Polanski on The Ghost Writer — is there anyone you feel that you’ve yet to work with?
PB: Oh, so many, so many.
NP: Who? Put their names out into the universe and see what comes back.
PB: I’d love to work with Ang Lee and David O. Russell, I’d love to work with Robert De Niro, Quentin Tarantino — he wanted to do James Bond.
NP: Yeah?
PB: Yeah.
NP: I could see that actually.
PB: We got so, so polluted one night, he and I. Just absolutely in our cups at the Four Seasons.
NP: That’s a nice euphemism. What were you getting “polluted” on?
PB: Apple Martinis.
NP: They’re lethal.
PB: Ah, lethal.
NP: Because they’re so fruity.
PB: Ah, fruity, we were being very fruity that night, the two of us.
Publicist: [walks through the door and interrupts our conversation to bring the interview to a close] On that fruity note… So sorry
PB: On that fruity note… there we go…
NP: Nooo! Just as I’m getting the story of the night Pierce Brosnan gets drunk on Apple Martinis with Quentin Tarantino. Argh!!!!
This Thursday May 9th on SuicideGirls Radio hosts Nicole Powers and Juturna Suicide will be joined in studio by Chris Wyse and Jason Mezilis from the band Owl. They’ll be talk about their rock & roll experiences – Chris also plays with The Cult – and playing songs live from Owl’s new album, The Right Thing.
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You can listen – and watch – the world’s leading naked radio show live on Thursday nights from 6 til 8 PM at our new state-of-the-art all digital home: TradioV.com/LA.
If you have questions for the SG Radio crew or our guests, you can call in during the live broadcast at: 1-855-TRV-inLA (1-855-878-4652)
For updates on all things SG Radio-related, like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter.
About Owl
After releasing their self-titled debut in 2009, Owl captivated audiences alongside the likes of Helmet, Jet and Hollywood all-star rock collective Camp Freddy. Between touring and recording commitments with Wyse’s other gig – playing bass in The Cult – Owl began writing what would become the band’s self-produced The Right Thing in early 2011.
Approaching timeless rock structures through a healthy amount of experimentation and instrumental intricacy, Owl takes flight locked and loaded with unforgettable hooks and impressive delivery on The Right Thing. It’s a combination that instantly impacts and takes up residence inside your head as all great hard rock should.
**UPDATE**
ICYMI: The recording on our May 9th show featuring some amazing live musical performances from Chris Wyse and Jason Mezilis from the band Owl.
This week’s SuicideGirls Gamer Of The Week is Annasthesia Suicide. I spoke to Annathesia about her favorite video games and asked for an insider tip on how guys can find a gamer girlfriend.
What made you choose the nickname “Annasthesia?”
I thought it would be clever to take a word that sounded like it could also have a name in it, and play on that. So “Anna” plus “Anesthesia” equaled “Annasthesia.”
How many tattoos and piercings do you have?
Well, I have the tops of my feet tattooed, the back of my neck, my chest, ribs, left forearm, and the makings of an eventual sleeve on my right arm. As far as piercings I’ve only had my lip, monroe, tongue, and belly button pierced. I temporarily donned a back corset piercing at my first Hell City. I think it was 20 piercings total.
Hell City?
Hell City Tattoo Convention. It’s one of the big events I look forward to each year now.
Which spot is the most painful to get tattooed?
So far my ribs have put every other spot to shame. The tops of the feet weren’t great and my chest has had its less than pleasant moments, but my ribs just sucked.
If you were to get one tattoo from a video game, such as a logo or symbol, what would it be?
I always have and still plan to get some Pokémon themed tattoo. I haven’t decided what yet, but it will happen. I like the idea of an 8-bit Togepi.
What are some of your other favorite games?
I’m the biggest Borderlands fan I know. I could play those into oblivion. Left 4 Dead and Left 4 Dead 2 are great guilty pleasures. I also love all Zelda games. I replay Ocarina of Time on my 3DS whenever I travel.
Who is your favorite character in Borderlands?
Now it’s Tiny Tina, without a doubt. I adore her, Mushy Snugglebites and Felicia Sexopants. Any girl who spends her spare time filling stuffed animals with high grade explosives is top notch in my book! Before her, it was probably be Claptrap or Scooter, and, though he only got briefly mentioned in the sequel, I have a spot in my heart for Butt Stallion as well.
What about favorite gun?
The one that’s going to do the most damage! I almost always go with a Maliwan. Elemental weapons are the way to go. Melt someone’s face off! And usually long range sniper rifles, unless I’m hunting zombies, then an automatic shotgun.
What is the best Pokémon video game in your opinion?
I think every Pokémon fan is a fan of the originals. So I’d have to say it’s a close tie between Red/Blue and Fire Red/Leaf Green, because seeing the original with all new graphics was just tits.
Where does Pokémon Snap fit into things?
I’m probably in the minority, but I love Pokémon Snap. I still have my copy for my N64 and a copy I downloaded onto my Wii. I still play both. I may have a Poké-problem, haha!
Say you were in charge of developing the very next Pokémon video game. What would you added or do differently?
Well, my biggest issues with the newer games is that they seem to have gotten really lazy with the Pokémon themselves, while focusing on how visually intriguing they can make the new environments. Seriously, Trubbish? The trash bag Pokémon? I want better Pokémon and eviler enemies.
Is it true that you can’t ignore Gary Oak’s girth?
Very true. It’s undeniable. And, let’s face it, Gary Oak is the silver-haired fox Anderson Cooper of the Pokémon world. Do you even want to deny his girth? The answer is no, no you do not.
What is the longest you have ever played a game in one sitting and which game was it?
Oh, wow! I’d probably have more impressive numbers here if I played MMORPGs, but I know I’ve spent at least 12 straight hours on both Borderlands and Pokémon respectively. I remember the first night I got Borderlands, I played for over eight hours straight before I even looked at the clock less than a foot from my Xbox. But, I think both of those would probably pale in comparison to the freakish hours I’ve put in playing various versions of The Sims over the years. That stuff is unholy addicting.
What is one game that you could beat anybody in?
Beat anyone at, as in competitively? I think I could still destroy anyone in the original Mario Party 64. Now that’s serious.
Many nerds dream about dating a girl that respects their gaming habits or is a gamer herself. What are some insider tips on how a guy can land a girl gamer such as yourself?
Don’t try too hard. We like a little bit of difficulty or we wouldn’t game, lol.
WHY DO YOU LOVE IT?: Depression Outlet is a place for people to talk about depression and other mental issues. Members are welcome to share their stories, while others are there because they want to draw on their experiences to help others in need. I love the group because I’ve found a comfort there that is sometimes hard to find in real life. I’m feeling just fine, but I absolutely love sharing experiences and helping people, so I keep visiting. It’s a place where you can find support, compassion, and comprehension.
DISCUSSION TIP: It’s important to keep in mind that a lot of the people in this group are putting their hearts out and sharing their stories. It takes a lot of bravery for some of us, and it’s extremely important to keep the confidence of the group. I think I can speak for the rest of the members when I say that respect is the most important rule.
MOST HEATED DISCUSSION THREAD: Right now, I would say the “When going through hell, keep going” thread is one of the most active ones. The title is pretty self-explanatory. It’s a thread that anyone can use to vent and find support around the idea that if you’re going through a hard time, it is important that you go THROUGH it and not around it.
BEST RANDOM QUOTE: There’s a lot of inspiring and helping advice, but one of the quotes I enjoyed most is:
“Acting in a positive direction while the “depression soundtrack” plays in your head is a bloody hard thing to do. Still, over time, action can erode the soundtrack.”
WHO’S WELCOME TO JOIN?: Anyone who’s going through depression (or other issues) or has gone through it, or anyone dealing with someone suffering from it. If you’re doing great but have an experience that you could or would like to share and if you love to help others, you’re welcome as well!
I’ve never really thought of myself as a tough chick. I don’t know why exactly, because when I think about it, I’ve always wanted to run wild with the boys. In elementary school my best friend Stephen and I would run around the school yard pretending we were Indiana Jones, swinging sticks as whips and tumbling. The girls played hopscotch. I never did.
When I was a little older I remember watching my neighbors Robert and Anthony wrestling on the playground. I said, “hit me!” but no one would. I yelled at Robert until I was blue in the face and all he said was, “My mother says I can’t hit a girl.” I was enraged. The boys could play rough, why couldn’t I? I ran around outside and turned brown in the sun, had skinned knees and collected salamanders from underneath rocks. I played with matchbox cars and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. But I was never one of the boys.
This was always my mindset growing up as a tall girl. I wasn’t one of the boys, but I wasn’t one of the girls either. When I was younger, I didn’t notice, but when junior high and high school started people were cruel. Until I developed the confidence to rock my height I was pitifully self-conscious. I tried to hide it, but I cried whenever the girls in the hall in school called me a man. I had never worn make-up or pretty clothes but suddenly I found myself wishing I owned anything besides flannel shirts and baggy jeans; for once I wanted to be girly and it seemed like no matter what happened I couldn’t find my place.
I almost wish now that my parents had pushed me into sports. I was a weird kid with not many friends, and at six feet tall in high school I had the track, volleyball and basketball coaches foaming at the mouth to get me to try out. But the kids at school broke my spirit. I wore black, moped around, and listened to Nirvana and Rage Against the Machine. I didn’t think my height served a purpose being a magnet for other people’s insults and ridicule.
***
It’s been well over a decade since those days…As I slip into the wrestling ring and square up with my opponent he pushes me off almost immediately. “Do it again, Laurelin,” he says. “You’re taller than almost everyone here and you’re supposed to be scary. Stand strong, stand tall, you’re bigger than me. Do it again.” We square up again and grapple, arms wrapped around one another’s necks and I stand tall and look my opponent in the eye. “Good,” he says. “Again, then hit me.”
I hit him, but not hard enough. “Again,” he says, and I hit him once more. “No,” he says. “Like this,” and CRACK, right across my back he hits me. The wind is knocked from my lungs but it doesn’t hurt, exactly. I think of my younger self, screaming at Robert on the playground, “HIT ME!” I don’t flinch and I stand tall, facing my opponent again. I nod and tell him I understand and he takes the hit and I toss him out of the ring. He ducks back in, smiling. “Good,” he says. “Again.”
Waking up the next morning I am so sore I can barely move. I swing my legs out of bed and I stare at them, black and swollen with mat burn. My elbows, purple and scraped, my shoulders and knees, back and hips the same. My cheek is tender from a ring rope snapping back in my face and my upper inner thighs are whipped with rope burn.
I’ll wear these bruises until they fade, badges of honor for finally feeling like I’m able to live up to my height. I don’t play volleyball, I don’t play basketball, I don’t run track. I don’t model. I am the only female in a men’s professional wrestling school, and I don’t get treated any differently because I wear eyeliner in the ring. I stand tall and take hits.
