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Jul 2011 01

by Flux

Every week we ask the ladies and gentlemen of the social web to show us their finest ink in celebration of Tattoo Tuesday; our favorite submission from Twitter and Tumblr each wins a free 3 month membership to SuicideGirls.com.

Check out this week’s winners below:


From Twitter:


@JessyHoneybee – What can we say? We love owls.

From Tumblr:


[caoine] – We will not tread on you.

If you haven’t won this week, don’t forget that you can enter each week until you do, so good luck next Tuesday, and happy inking!

A few things to remember:

  • You have to be 18 to qualify.
  • The tattoo has to be yours…that means permanently etched on your body.
  • On Twitter we search for your entries by looking up the hashtag #TattooTuesday, so make sure you include it in your tweet!

Check out the Tattoo Tuesday winners of weeks past!

 

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Jul 2011 01

by Mur Lafferty

SuicdeGirls presents the fourteenth installment of our Fiction Friday sci-fi series, Marco and the Red Granny, which is brought to you by SG columnist Mighty Mur a.k.a. cyber commentator Mur Lafferty.

Marco and the Red Granny is set in a not-so-distant future where an alien species, the Li-Jun, has transformed the moon into the new artistic center of the universe, where the Sally Ride Lunar Base soon gains the nickname “Mollywood.” These aliens can do amazing things with art and the senses, allowing a painting, for example, to stimulate senses other than sight. However, humans remain suspicious of the Li-Jun’s emotion-imbued goods, so while their entertainment can be beamed back to earth, a trade embargo prevents anything from being physically imported to the planet.

In the previous installments, Marco, a writer whose career has long been in the doldrums, gets a surprise call from an agent he thought he no longer had informing him that he has received an offer from Mollywood for a much coveted Li-Jun patronage. Keen to catch up career-wise with his ex-GF Penelope, who’d unceremoniously dumped him after being recruited by the Li-Jun two years earlier, Marco hastily jumps on the next shuttle to the moon. Once aboard, he finds himself sitting next to a seemingly unassuming old lady called Heather, who turns out to be The Red Granny, a legend in Li-Jun’s reality show world for being a three-time champion of The Most Dangerous Game (which requires contestants to sign away the rights to their life).

After settling into his new accommodations at House Blue, Marco has a brief meeting with his new patron, a Li-Jun called Thirteen. It’s only then that Marco realizes he’s never been shown the terms of his employment, and a sense of unease sets in. That evening, Marco is taken on a trip to see The Red Granny in action in The Most Dangerous Game. After a bloody battle, the senior reality TV star is again victorious. The viciousness of the game leaves The Red Granny unconscious, and Marco shocked, disturbed, and in need of a stiff drink. Unfortunately stiff drinks are frowned upon by the Li-Jun, so Marco settles for an early night

The next day, Marco learns first hand about the process that enables the Li-Jun to put taste into paintings, music into pie, and stories into (nonalcoholic) beverages. Having had his deepest and most depraved memories dredged and thoroughly probed by the aliens so they can be monitored and recorded, Marco finally sees the terms of his contract. He ultimately accepts the Li-Jun’s too-good-to-refuse offer, and embarks on his new life at House Blue. However, though he’s been handed everything he ever wanted, somehow the reality of it is hollow.

Twenty thousand words into his new graphic novel, with his first deadline looming, Marco suffers from a severe case of writers block, and searches for inspiration in the bottom of a glass that’s actually had something worth drinking in it. To this end, he stumbles across an illicit drinking establishment on the seedier side of the moon which turns out to be run by a collective of folks who are strictly persona non grata as far as the Li-Jun are concerned – The Alcoholic’s Guild. There Marco has an uneasy encounter with a glass or three of gin, his ex-GF Penelope, who is now going by the name Knowledge, and her AG sponsor, Defect. After downing one too many drinks, Marco begins to get a sense of exactly how severe of an infraction the Li-Jun consider the consumption of alcohol to be.

While attempting to conceal his inebriation as he sneaks back into House Blue, Marco is caught red handed by his Li-Jun keeper Seven (it was probably his spontaneous vomiting that gave him away). The punishment is a second bout of mind raping/mapping. Afterwards, with his patronage in jeopardy, Heather gives him a ‘special’ necklace to calm his nerves and promises to plead his case with Thirteen.

The following morning, Heather takes Marco on a behind-the-scenes tour of the secret areas of House Blue where the Li-Jun infuse emotion into art. The Red Granny also reveals that everything created in Mollywood will soon be permitted to be legally imported back to earth. Duly inspired and placated, Marco is allowed to resume his patronage…However, that was before he got kidnapped twice in one day. The first time by Penelope/Knowledge and Defect of The Alcoholic’s Guild, who made him realize the Li-Jun had brainwashed him into compliance, and the second time by the Li-Jun, who were rather upset about the fact he’d just been fraternizing with said Alcoholic’s Guild – albeit initially unwillingly.

[..]

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Jul 2011 01

by Aaron Colter

This week’s post is short, like the albums on the list. No time to waste. We’re all dying. Besides, what has Tibet gained in their patience?

[..]

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Jul 2011 01

by Daniel Robert Epstein

“I just rolled a joint”
– Zach Galifianakis

The landscape of standup comedy on television has taken a surprising turn in the past few years. People like Artie Lange, Patton Oswalt and Paul Mooney are doing these amazing standup shows and are videotaping them in a very cool verite way. In the wake of the success of The Comedians of Comedy, Zach Galifianakis and director/editor Michael Blieden have teamed up again to bring Zach Galifianakis – Live at the Purple Onion to DVD. Besides Galifianakis’ hysterical set at the world renowned venue, we also get to see his “brother” Seth get interviewed by NPR’s Brian Unger and get some real personal moments with Zach.

Read our exclusive interview with Zach Galifianakis on SuicideGirls.com.

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Jul 2011 01

Creepy Suicide in Dirty Diana

  • INTO: Pirates, photography, Juicy Couture, Chanel, Alexander McQueen, pumps, vintage things, Baroque and Victorian era fashion, the ‘40s, Elvis, Christian Louboutin heels, cars and motorcycles, rum, burlesque, pinup fashion, high fashion, boobs, tight-lacing, Tumblr, and smoking the ganj.
  • NOT INTO: Anonymous haters – or haters of any kind, fakers, liars, cheaters, douche bags, gross pervs, chesters, and Jesus freaks…
  • MAKES ME HAPPY: Pirate ships and pirate talk, big beautiful buds, hot sunny days, adventures, photo shoots, music, the ocean and all the creatures inside, kittens and puppies, bats, Juicy and Chanel, a closet full of Louboutins, Will Ferrell.
  • MAKES ME SAD: Being lied to, being alone, cold, the past, how much hate is in the world, animal abuse =(
  • HOBBIES: Getting naked, capturing every moment before it’s gone, high fashion photography and makeup.
  • 5 THINGS I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT: Reds, iTouch, Ganja, D90, Dewoowoo.
  • VICES: Disclosure.
  • I SPEND MOST OF MY FREE TIME: Creating chaos and destruction, getting high and fucking shit up, wishing I was a pirate!

Get to know Creepy better over at SuicideGirls.com!