by Jen Friel

Don’t know about you, but I can’t stand social media experts, ninjas or gurus. They’re always trying to one up each other, establishing dominance, and you can’t EVER just get the real deal from them on what you need to know. I am here today to humbly say that in my non-expert opinion, these are the 5 main ways to not suck at social media. Let’s cut out the BS and just get to the bottom line, shall we…

1. Do not, ever, sync your social media accounts together

I CRINGE every time I see Facebook and Twitter still synced in my Facebook news feed. You’ve seen it before too via third party services like Hootsuite, Ping, or Tweetdeck. Twitter and Facebook are entirely different mediums and need to be dealt with accordingly. Twitter offers more open access to the global consciousness while Facebook is more for spreading info to your current network.

To more efficiently market a post on Twitter you should implement relevant hashtags into the message. I even do it on my site (TalkNerdyToMeLover.com) directly. This allows for new people who may not be following you to be able to easily discover the message via the hashtag. Additionally, anytime it gets RTed by other people, even more people will be able to access the message. Of course, this genuinely also worked with my branding (being nerdy and all) but it’s SUPER helpful and DEFINITELY helped grow my brand so quickly.

For Facebook, pictures work. I don’t know why or how, but every single time I post a picture with a short message and a link my numbers shoot up three times more than if I’d simply posted a standard link with the populated thumbnail.

The way our eyes absorb content on the platforms are SUPER different, so please, unsync the accounts. It’s okay, I promise there is life after it.

2. Be human

I can’t tell you how many people in my feed literally sound like they’re reading toaster instructions. There’s no personality or passion in their message, just very simple words followed by whatever link they are promoting. That shit is so boring and no one is paying attention to it. Trust me, I used to do it! I spent so long being so prim and proper, and it got me ABSOLUTELY nowhere. My writing style is definitely unique – as is my improper use of punctuation at all times. But it’s my jam! I write like I talk, and I communicate with people not like they are students sitting in a classroom, but rather as if we’re buddies grabbing a beer at a bar. People like this kind of intimacy, and people respond to it. So do it!!!

3. Don’t just RT other people’s tweets – have an opinion

I REFUSE to follow people on Twitter who only RT other people’s tweets. Do they not have a SINGLE thought of their own?? Your Twitter feed is an expression of who you are. Have an opinion! Have a voice!! When I started on Twitter in June of 2009 (I’m not an early adopter), I used my feed as a place to express all the thoughts in my head. Literally no one was listening since my following was miniscule, but gradually, by implementing hashtags and by expressing SOME SORT OF OPINION ON SOMETHING, people began RTing me and slowly but surely my following grew. There’s no right or wrong way to admin your Twitter feed. You just have to be you. Get all Madonna circa 1989 and Express Yourself!!

4. Get rid of the cartoon avatar, and be you!

People with cartoon avatars scare the bejesus out of me (unless of course it’s your business logo). There is something UNBELIEVABLY creepy about a guy who has a picture of a frog, or Bugs Bunny as his avatar. Your social media avatar is a representation of you. What’s with the cartoon? All you’re projecting to friends and/or potential mates is a serious image issue. Be you, be awesome, and no matter what you’ve got going down – rock that shit! I’ve been asked out on Twitter by COUNTLESS dudes with cartoon avatars and have yet to say yes to a single one for this very reason. You might as well just be walking around with “issues” stamped on your forehead. Quit it!!!

5. Leave the passive aggressiveness and negativity at the door.

No one likes a Debbie or Doug Downer. If you’re having a bad day, start a private blog. I’m ALL about venting these things to the universe, but people actually check their social feeds and will actually see what you are saying. Yes, you might be sitting behind your monitor in your room all alone, but the SECOND you blast something out into social media it is then indexed in perpetuity. Create an anonymous Tumblr account – some sort of something – just keep ALLLLLLL of that Negative Ned or Nelly-ness off of social sites. Your friends and followers will thank you later.

Happy social media-ing everyone!!

Jen Friel is a lifecaster and corporate sponsored minimalist. She went out on over 103 dates in 9 months while couch surfing for a year building her website and bartering social media to live. Consequently, she’s an accidental expert on online dating. You can read all about her ongoing adventures on OKCupid at TalkNerdyToMeLover.com and follow them on Twitter.

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by SG’s Team Agony feat. Rydell

Let us answer life’s questions – because great advice is even better when it comes from SuicideGirls.

Q: Do you have advice for me about how to make the first move (make contact) and let a nice girl know that I really like her. I’m a little bit unsure because I’m in a wheelchair. She’s not. I just don’t want her to reject me right away only because I’m in a wheelchair. Can you give me advise on how to make a good first impression?

A: Well my advice to you is don’t go into this looking at the end result. Don’t focus on that fact you want a relationship from this girl, but instead break it down. First just make contact and strike up a conversation. Let that be your first goal. ‘Cause if it doesn’t go any farther than that, then there’s no disappointment and no expectations from her on your side.

Then look at building a casual acquaintance, which has the potential in time to grow into a friendship with this girl and build on that. As you and her become more comfortable with each other, you can get to know her as a person and vice versa, and see if you really want something more. If so, then you already laid the groundwork for a solid relationship.

As far as making initial contact with her, just be yourself, confidence is a must. If you don’t feel it, fake it. Be the smart, witty, charming, funny person you have inside and let it show. If you don’t think of yourself as being at a disadvantage compared to other guys, then she wont see that either. Go into it thinking you’re the greatest guy out there, and she will see that. And honestly, if she can’t overlook some metal between your legs, then she isn’t someone worthy of your time!

Good luck and keep me posted on it!

<3 Rydell

Got Problems? Let SuicideGirls’ team of Agony Aunts provide solutions. Email questions to: gotproblems@suicidegirls.com

Charmaine Suicide in Give and Take

• MAKES ME HAPPY: Conversation, pretty lingerie, kisses, cuddlin’ naked, painting, writing, getting lost in a good book, getting dolled up, shoes, manicures and pedicures, sunbathing, rings.
• MAKES ME SAD: Poor communication, disconnect, missing people, procrastination, bad teeth, ignorance, small talk, losing things, car trouble.
• HOBBIES: Painting, reading, modeling, acting.
• 5 THINGS I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT: My jewelry, a pen, amber oil, Q-Tips, and my iPhone.
• VICES: To many to tell.
• I SPEND MOST OF MY FREE TIME: Being lazier than I should.

Get to know Charmaine better over at SuicideGirls.com!

by Daniel Robert Epstein

“It’’s my theory that 90 percent of acting is the other actor.”
– Angelica Huston

Should I be lusting after Angelica Huston, a woman that’’s almost twice my age? I don’’t know if it’’s a holdover from when she used to glide across the room as Morticia Addams but she is wicked sexy. Plus, now that she is an intimate part of the Wes Anderson oeuvre, it makes her even sexier. She has a serious lock on the loving ice queen in films which she continues as the estranged wife of Bill Murray’’s lead character in The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou.

Read our exclusive interview with Angelica Huston on SuicideGirls.com.