by SG’s Team Agony feat. Dalila

Let us answer life’s questions – because great advice is even better when it comes from SuicideGirls.

Q. I am in a relationship with a woman whom I love dearly and generally we are very happy. My only complaint is that she has a secret social life. For instance, she doesn’t work on Tuesday, but she will be gone all day and come home after I get home. If I ask what she’s doing, she says I am out of line, even if I am just trying to make conversation. She has a group of friends that she does happy hour with and I am not allowed to meet them and I know nothing about them – not even their names. Asking about them has caused a couple of fights so I have let it go. I am also not allowed to know where they meet for happy hour.

These are the same questions that make her very upset when I have asked them. I am not concerned that she might be cheating on me. I trust her. What really bothers me is that she feels like she needs to keep secrets from me. I really do not have any secrets and, except when she asks about my time in Iraq, I will tell her anything. I think people that keep secrets have something to hide. What do you think?

A: I don’t think that a person who keeps secrets necessarily has something to hide. People can decide to tell or not to tell, and sometimes they choose not to because they simply prefer to keep stuff to themselves. And there’s no clear evidence of seediness here.

Just think: what happened last time you had a relationship and you and your significant other had common friends? Usually, when couples split, friends are split too. There are the ones who stay with the girl, others who stick with the boy: but the original gang is often, sadly, no more. Your girlfriend might have experienced this kind of thing before, and, as a result, prefers to keep her closest slice of friends strictly to herself. Then again, she lets you join her and other mates, so perhaps she just wants to be herself with one particular set of friends. Maybe she wants to vent a bit in a safe space, with friends she really trusts. I’m sure there are things you’d prefer not to tell your parents, or you workmates, or your mates, even your girlfriend. Think about those. You wouldn’t go for sex advice to your grandma, would you?

It’s also true that sharing every single moment of the day brings most relationships to an end, so you should cherish the fact that your girlfriend is not the super sticky type. It’s actually a healthy sign that she has her own friends and interests; you’ve gotten yourself a woman, congrats! And a little mystery can be a good thing. Not sharing every little, tiny, weenie thingy is the best way to keep your companion awake and interested. Don’t sweat, it’s a good sign!

Cheers,

Dalila

Got Problems? Let SuicideGirls’ team of Agony Aunts provide solutions. Email questions to: gotproblems@suicidegirls.com

by Blogbot

Artist / SG Member Name: Lil Tuffy

Mission Statement: Tuffy doesn’t really do the mission statement thing. That’s why he left the corporate world. He says his mission is to never work in a cubicle again.

Medium: Screen-print/mixed-media.

Aesthetic: Although his aesthetic changes frequently, there is always a cohesive style that’s makes a piece unmistakably his. He’s generally known for his use of found imagery, typography, minimal use of colors and negative space.

Notable Achievements: CBGB’s 30th Anniversary poster, work included in Rock & Roll Hall of Fame archives. Just released 500th gig poster. About to release limited edition line of messenger bags and T-shirts for Chrome Bags.

Why We Should Care: Tuffy is the perfect example of “do what you love and success will follow.” What started as a hobby 10 years ago is now a full-time career designing entire poster series for bands like Pavement and St. Vincent. His artwork and gig posters are exhibited all over the world with shows scheduled in Los Angeles, Chicago, New York, London, Barcelona, Hamburg and more in 2012.

I Want Me Some: Visit: liltuffy.bigcartel.com, society6.com/LilTuffy, and tuffingtonpost.tumblr.com/

[..]

by Rourke Suicide

A column which highlights Suicide Girls and their fave groups.

This week Rourke takes a shot at explaining why she loves SG’s Girl Gamers group.

Members: 838 / Comments: 3,402

WHY DO YOU LOVE IT?: A less testosterone-filled, but still sometimes competitive, take on the world of gaming. It’s always great to see what others are playing, share opinions, and get stoked for new releases with other ladies. Also, breaking the stereotype of nerdy boy gamers and proving that talented and knowledgeable gamers can be fun, sexy, badass, and female!



Also, on a side note, Oogie recently started a new blog called Teek’s Gitties for pictures of all us nerdy gamer gals to post sexy pics with our gaming gear! You can find the thread here.

DISCUSSION TIP: Firstly, use your spoilers! No one wants parts or the ending of a game they’ve been working hard on and/or enjoying ruined for them. Also, remember that everyone has their favorite type of game, so bring respect and don’t be overly competitive.



BEST RANDOM QUOTE: “[Store Harassment] Have any of ya’ll ladies ever experienced this? When you step into a game retailer and for some reason guys think it’s okay to start holla-ing at you like they’ve never seen a girl before?”



MOST HEATED DISCUSSION THREAD: “Best Zelda Game Ever?” – Who can really decide?!



WHO’S WELCOME TO JOIN?: Girls (only) gamers (obviously)!


[..]

by Nahp Suicide

DarrylDarko has been a photographer for SuicideGirls since 2009. He lives in San Jose, California and has been working on an interesting SG side project called “A Day With A Suicide Girl.” So far he’s shot Rambo and Carrina for this series.

How did you first get involved with SuicideGirls?

I had known about SuicideGirls for a really long time, and the site has always drawn me in one way or another, but I didn’t get involved with the site until I found Saint, on Model Mayhem. I had never really thought about seriously shooting for the site until I met her and after a first initial test shoot we decided to shoot a set. That set, luckily was bought and kind of started my road down the SuicideGirls path. However, it would be awhile though before things really got rolling.

What’s your background photography-wise?

I’m almost completely self-taught, other than taking a few courses from some community colleges. I had been shooting for a while already, and they were basic courses I kinda felt I would benefit from to kind of put a bit of structure to all the information I already knew. Looking back, I kind of wish I had gone to something a bit more interactive and challenging than just those courses, but something about art school classes was off-putting.

What was the first photo you had published?

I had entered the Crossroads Trading Company fashion contest with this shot. It won an “Honorable Mention” and they bought the rights to it. At some point in the future after that happened, one of my friends told me to that they were using it at Crossroads stores in Portland as a poster so that was pretty cool at the time.

How would you describe your style?

It’s funny how shooting for the site has changed my style. I used to be more into outlandish ideas and wanting to really shoot stuff that was just “different.” With SG sets, I do like the idea of trying to capture the girl as naturally as possible, that’s why I kinda stay away from pinup-ish poses because that’s not the girl, that would be more of an act they’re doing. I’m trying to find a happy balance between the two. I’m still working on that.

What gear do you use?

I used to use a Canon 5D, but have switched to the 7D for the time being. I use 35mm, 50mm, and 24-105mm lenses. I want to go back to full-frame badly.

How important is Photoshop in your final images?

Fairly important. I’m able to give photos an extra punch and screw with the colors to make them stand out more, plus smooth out whatever flaws the picture may have, but I try to stay away from making things look fake.

What gives you ideas and inspires you to create such amazing sets?

I’d say some of the biggest inspirations are found on the site itself. Before I started shooting for the site Cymagen‘s personal work was a big factor in getting me to shoot more. Since I’ve been on site, Cherry, Sean and Vermelho were bigger influences. I also had a lot of inspiration from movies and music videos. What I really want to work on more is having a narrative to sets so they’re not just ‘a girl getting naked’ so I’ve been looking to more editorial shoots and photographers who specialize in that lately.

What is your favorite image?

[Above.] I don’t think I could narrow it down to just one but this one of Silvi is one of my favorites.

Tell us why it’s your fave and how you achieved it?

It’s one of my favorites because as an image it just seems so perfect. The light wraps around her body really nicely giving it this comforting “bathed in light” feel. This shot was achieved by light coming through the window in the front, but also there was light coming through a window on the left-hand side but it bounced off the ground, which was hard wood and gave it that nice side lighting. Some minor Photoshop enhancements and that’s what you get. The funny story about shooting this set was that when we arrived at the location I found that my camera’s battery was dead, despite me charging it the night before. Luckily my friend’s roomate had a Rebel and I was able to use that camera with one of my lenses. Everything worked out in the end.

Is there anybody or anything you would love to photograph that you haven’t? (And tell us why)

Yes, I have an entire list of girls on site that I’d love to shoot someday. I’ll just list three:

– 1. Patton – because she defines ‘blonde bombshell’ perfectly. I’ve been told I have a thing for blondes though…

– 2. Radeo – because she’s Radeo.

– 3. GoGo – she has this awesome presence in photos and is the perfect mix of a supermodel and SuicideGirl.

Related Posts:
In Focus: The Photographers of SuicideGirls feat. Albertine
In Focus: The Photographers of SuicideGirls feat. Holley
In Focus: The Photographers of SuicideGirls feat. Dwam
In Focus: The Photographers of SuicideGirls feat. Writeboy
In Focus: The Photographers of SuicideGirls feat. IvyLlamas
In Focus: The Photographers of SuicideGirls feat. Lavezzarro

by SG’s Team Agony feat. Seizure

Let us answer life’s questions – because great advice is even better when it comes from SuicideGirls.

Q. I’ve been with my boyfriend for over six months now. I love him, and he’s great to/for me. But he talks about marriage and spending our lives together. I know that doesn’t have to be right away, but even thinking about it gives me terrible butterflies in my stomach, and not the good kind. I’m almost 19 and I’ve never even thought about getting married, let alone at such a young age. The thing is, I can move past the marriage talk, but there’s something else in the way too. I’m enjoying every moment we spend together – the sex is good and he’s a total sweetheart who means extremely well – but I don’t see myself with him for a while. I’m not a cheater. I will remain faithful. But I can’t help flirting with other guys. It’s just in my nature to flirt. I can’t stop doing it even if I’m with someone. I really want to be with someone else sexually, but I won’t do it while I’m with my boyfriend. I guess what I’m saying is I want to have my cake and eat it too. What should I do?

A: My advice to you would be not to look too deeply in to his talks about marriage. Chances are that he’s just trying to let you know that he is serious about being with you. Maybe the fact that you are flirty with other guys is what’s making him want to let you know that he’s so serious about you. As you said, you are still young and so many people get in to relationships too early.

Honestly, if you are flirting with other guys and feel like you want to be with other guys sexually, the fact that you are questioning yourself means that you know that what you are doing is (at least a little) wrong.
 You shouldn’t ‘have your cake and eat it’ unless you are in agreement with your boyfriend that you are both able to have a ‘piece of the cake.’
 In short, if you are going to act on your impulses to be with other guys, let him know that you don’t want to be with him. Or, let him know that you want this and suggest an open relationship. Most importantly, be honest with him and yourself.



Good luck!

Seizure

Got Problems? Let SuicideGirls’ team of Agony Aunts provide solutions. Email questions to: gotproblems@suicidegirls.com

by Blogbot

Artist / SG Member Name: Jake Prendez a.k.a. Tattoo_Jake

Mission Statement: I live because of art. It was my avenue out of gangs, it was there for me when my mom was sick, it was there for me during all my break ups. It has always been my outlet that has allowed me to express what I couldn’t say in words. I was raised to leave a place better then when I got there and I try to use my talents to make this world a little bit better.

Medium: Mostly Acrylic and aerosol.

Aesthetic: My style is heavily influenced by street and subversive art, Chicano/indigenous culture, Los Angeles, and social justice movements.

Notable Achievements: Despite having dyslexia, despite constantly being told by teachers that I’d never make it, despite having a drug and alcohol addicted parent, despite being involved in gangs, despite being a father at 19, I was able to graduate from college and enter a masters program. Last December I was able to go to Guanajuato Mexico for two weeks to paint two murals for foster youth girls at the Buen Pastor Shelter with ten other LA artists. We were also able to do workshops for the girls on stenciling, photography, graphic design, drawing, and painting.

Why We Should Care: I am still lucky enough to be painting for myself so I really don’t care if anyone else likes my work or not. I paint what I want and what I want to see. Art has saved my life and I try to use my gifts to help others, whether it be “at risk” youth or used in social justice campaigns. My goal isn’t to impress collectors but to use my skills to uplift communities.

I Want Me Some: Visit: laughterinsurgency.com/

[..]

by Laurelin

I have always felt a little indifferent about Valentine’s Day. It seems cliché to hate it, stupid to love it, and all in all, just another day of the week. I don’t think I have ever had a spectacular Valentine’s Day even when I was in a relationship. In college, my boyfriend at the time told me we were supposed to go to dinner and then he wound up not being able to afford it. I was crushed. But I remember one other day, in the middle of the summer when he left a single red rose under my windshield wipers, and he hid so when I looked around the parking lot I didn’t see him until when I turned around, he was right there kissing me. It was one of the most romantic moments of my life, and it was also just another day.

A few Valentine’s days ago my boyfriend at the time and I went to a romantic dinner at a candlelit historic restaurant in Boston’s Beacon Hill district. The tables were so close together and we were both so tall that we looked like bulls in a china shop trying to be classy and quiet amidst normal sized couples. We wound up eating so much food and dessert that we couldn’t even make room for drinks afterwards, and we were both massively uncomfortable for the rest of the evening. Sexy.

I feel like Valentine’s Day is just one of those days that winds up making people feel bad, so I usually just do what I always do on every other day: hit the bars. If anyone is out at a bar in Boston on Valentine’s Day chances are they’re single. The odds of running into a guy lying about having a girlfriend on Valentine’s Day are slim to none, so I look forward every year to some guilt free bar scene action.

One year ago today I was with four single friends. One guy had just been dumped (they got back together), one had just been snubbed my by best friend and was nursing a bruised ego (he is now happily in a relationship), and then there was me and my friend Lindsay, two girls who can’t seem to be tamed. We were drinking twenty three ounce Harpoon UFO drafts and knocking back shots of Jameson when I glanced up and happened to meet eyes with a guy standing across the bar. I leaned into my friend Jay not-so-stealthily, “he’s CUTE!” I whispered, quickly looking away, my cheeks burning.

Not two seconds later I had a shot of Patron placed in front of me, and the bartender gestured towards that guy across the bar. “It’s on him,” the bartender said. I looked up and the guy was holding a shot as well, and I knew that there was no turning back now, I had to rip this shot and act like tequila didn’t make me throw up in my mouth. Turning down salt and lime, I got the shot down the hatch and stood up to go say thanks. I flashed my best smile and held out my hand, and I met Dan.

I remember leaving the bar that night with a smile stuck to my face. Who goes to a bar and meets a guy on Valentine’s Day? It was perfect, so sappy, so lame, and oh my god, why couldn’t I stop smiling? That night was the start of something that wound up being silly, tumultuous, fun and pretty important. Dan has become a staple in my life, someone I call when I need advice, need a drinking partner, need a pep talk on getting over an ex. We just got back from an 11 day cruise with a few other friends, and I couldn’t have asked for a better partner in crime with whom to spend that time in paradise with. Looking back one year later I can’t help but still have a smile stuck on my face.

It’s funny, how life works out. I always thought that Valentine’s Day was just another day, and it is — but you never know when life is going to hand you someone special — and as always, extra points when that someone special is holding a shot of tequila with your name on it.

[..]