Blackboards In Porn is a highly amusing site that claims to celebrate “pornographers who go the extra mile when set dressing classroom porn and actually write something on the blackboard.”

Its anonymous but obviously British editor and webmaster, who we’re reliably informed has a BEng in Electronic Engineering and an MA in Screenwriting, focuses his or her considerable analytical and creative skills on the equations, diagrams, and notations drawn on said boards, checking for accuracy and scouring for greater meaning.

Though not a porn site ourselves (we like to think we’re naughty but not nasty, and pinup rather than pornography), we thought it’d be fun to set BiP some homework. Thus we challenged ’em to set their logical prowess loose on the chalk boards of SuicideGirls. Here’s what BiP came up with while checking out Nina Suicide’s Back To School photo essay…

WORK HARD AND DO YOUR BEST

Lessons in Life – universal
Computer Science – A-level/undergraduate level

There can be few better exhortations to students than this. Working hard and doing one’s best will always produce the finest possible results, either in the classroom or on the playing field. After any exam or sporting challenge there is no failure if one can say afterwards “I did my best.” (England footballers please take note.)

A game of Noughts and Crosses is underway on the blackboard. If this has been done by a student then it should have been rubbed off immediately (see post #9 re Wilson and Kelling’s broken windows theory). But if this is actually part of the lesson then a gold star should be awarded as Noughts and Crosses is a great introduction to many mathematical and computer science concepts from combinations and symmetry to artificial intelligence.

A first question to pose to the class would be how many games of Noughts and Crosses are possible (the game tree size)? A naive answer would be 9! = 362,880 (assuming X always goes first). However, many games will be over before all the squares are filled, and many more are simply rotations and reflections of others (in effect there are not nine, but only three starting places: corner, centre and edge). Taking these into account gives an answer of 26,830.

Devising an algorithm to produce perfect play is also a favorite challenge, exploring ideas such as backwards reasoning and recursion. These can then be applied to other, more complex games such as Connect 4 and draughts, through to unsolved games such as Reversi, chess and Go (with its game tree complexity of 10360).

However, if this is an attempt to teach the strategy of perfect play then one must hope that the teacher has picked a very poorly played game to illustrate what not to do. Assuming that X’s first move was in the corner (always the best start: of the then 73 possible games, assuming perfect play on X’s part, 71 result in victory and two in a draw), then O has immediately blundered by playing the far edge instead of the centre (where his/her only hope of a draw can come from), resulting in what should be certain victory for X. X could then force a win by playing the centre, but has him/herself blundered by playing middle bottom. O can now snatch a draw from the jaws of defeat by playing centre or top right, leaving X to harp on about how the Wags should have been allowed to stay in the team hotel.

Despites its pedagogical pedigree, Noughts and Crosses quickly becomes futile when both players can easily force a draw. This was well-illustrated in WarGames, when the military supercomputer, equating the game to global thermonuclear war, evaluated all possible outcomes and remarked, “Strange game. The only winning move is not to play.” Failing that, just work hard and do your best.

8/10 An inspired choice of teaching material.

Visit blackboardsinporn.blogspot.com/ for more case studies on mathematics as featured in erotica.

by SG’s Team Agony feat. Casca and Leandra

Let us answer life’s questions – because great advice is even better when it comes from SuicideGirls.

Q. I was with my school sweetheart for 11 years and was married for 6 of those 11 years. I worked hard to give her the world till one day I found out she had been cheating on me. We tried to give it a second try. Because we got married on Halloween, I paid for us to go to Euro Disney, but thing’s after we came back got even worse, to the point that now our marriage has ended. I still love and want her in my life, but I’m just an old romantic at heart. Friend’s say that I will find someone special again but I don’t know? I’m a tattooed English guy who feels lost in the world we live in!

A: Hiya hun! I’d like to start by saying that I can relate to what you are going through. I started seeing my partner in my first year of college and we have had more than our fare share of ups and downs.

Leaving school and starting college can be a very emotionally draining time. It therefore a common that the passion filled relationships we had with our childhood sweethearts tend to change or fizzle out around this time in our lives. There is nothing wrong with adapting and trying to make it work, but there is also nothing wrong with knowing it is time to call it a day. It seems like you have tried very hard to make the relationship work, and that’s great, but it sounds like there were some trust issues going on and that can ultimately kill a relationship.

It can be hard to move on from your first love, but it can be done. You will find someone else in the future and part of the fun in is finding that person. You will never forget this person, and you don’t even have to get over her; the key is to learn from that relationship and pour all the good stuff into a new one. Your friends are right, there are plenty of other women out there, and you will never know if one of them is that special someone until you try.

Good luck and all the best!

Casca
XOX

Q. Hey Suicide Girls, I’ve been having problems with a girl I have know since her birth. We lost contact in 1999. She called me out of the blue in 2006 and we have been best friends since. We fell in love a couple months back, but she told me she doesn’t want to date me right now. I didn’t think this was fair.

What do I take this as? And should I continue with the other girl and ask her out being that she is 18?

A: I’m going to be brutally honest, I don’t think you can be too much into this girl because you are looking elsewhere, and someone else has caught your eye. She has said she doesn’t want to date you, and that would be enough for me to consider it over and done with as far as a relationship is concerned. Her asking for help, and then not being particularly grateful, also indicates she was just using you rather than looking to start up anything. Furthermore, you sound like you have already had enough of this, so I would let the girl and the situation go.

As for the other girl, I don’t think age really matters –– it depends on the maturity of the people involved. Most of my more intense relationships have been with older men. The problem is, how do you approach someone you don’t know? I would tread carefully, you don’t want to come across creepy in any way or scare her off. Just start with casual conversation and see if you guys could have something going on between you.

Good luck and thanks for writing in!

Leandra
xxx

Got Problems? Let SuicideGirls’ team of Agony Aunts provide solutions. Email questions to: gotproblems@suicidegirls.com

by Blogbot

Artist / SG Member Name: Oliver / Ortegart71

Mission Statement: My work is an only-spare-time-thing, I do it to recreate from work, from the noise of this world, to make time stand still for some moments.

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by Rachelle Suicide

A column which highlights Suicide Girls and their fave groups.

This week, Rachelle Suicide sizes up SG’s All Boobs Great And Small Group.

Members: 4,988 / Comments: 10,300

• WHY DO YOU LOVE IT?: Breasts are like snowflakes, each one different, unique, and beautiful in it’s own way. This group has everything: web cam boobs, Suicide Girls’ boobs, great cleavage, tattooed tits, side boob, under boob (my personal favorite view), small, medium and large breasts. Who wouldn’t love it?
• DISCUSSION TIP: Everyone has their own personal preferences on boob size and shape, be respectful. This is a positive, fun group –– negativity isn’t tolerated.
• BEST RANDOM QUOTE: I don’t know why but I love seeing a girl scratch an itchy boob, or adjust their bra strap. Call me a perv if you must, I just think it’s cute, sometimes they make really cute faces when doing so. Anyone else in this boat?”
• MOST HEATED DISCUSSION THREAD: The “Boobs That Made You Join!!!” thread contains some of the hottest Suicide Girls AND their boobs! Very hot.
• WHO’S WELCOME TO JOIN?: All Boobs Great and Small is for boob enthusiasts who appreciate all shapes and sizes.

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by Ryker Suicide

Last night I made a really yummy tomato bisque. It’s great served topped with your favorite garnishes (cheese, cracked pepper, croustinis, or fresh julienned basil!) and with baby grilled cheese sammies! It’s a perfect cold weather super food, and is easy to make. It also makes a great appetizer for fall/winter dinner parties served in a martini glass

Ingredients:

• 3 tablespoons good olive oil
• 1 1/2 cups chopped red onions (2 onions)
• 2 handfuls of baby carrots, chopped
• 3-4 cloves minced fresh garlic
• 2 pounds vine-ripened tomatoes, coarsely chopped (3 large
• 1 can diced tomatoes
• 1 1/2 teaspoons sugar
• 1 tablespoon tomato paste
• 1/4 cup packed chopped fresh basil leaves, plus julienned basil leaves, for garnish
• 3 cups chicken stock
• 1 tablespoon kosher salt
• 2 teaspoons freshly ground black pepper
• 3/4 cup heavy cream
• Garnishes can include all or any of: julienned fresh basil, a basil/Parmesan croustini**, shredded Parmesan, and/or fresh cracked pepper.

Preparation:

Heat the olive oil in a large, heavy-bottomed pot over medium-low heat. Add the onions and carrots and sauté for about 10 minutes, until very tender. Add the garlic and cook for 1 minute. Add the tomatoes, sugar, tomato paste, basil, chicken stock, salt and pepper, and stir well. Bring the soup to a boil, lower the heat, and simmer uncovered for about 45- 50 minutes, until the tomatoes are very tender and aromatic.

Add the cream to the soup and ladle it by serving into blender (or process through food mill or veggie mixer). Reheat the soup over low heat just until hot and serve with desired garnishes.

**Directions for Parmesan Croustini:

Slice a loaf of fresh French bread into small diagonal pieces, sprinkle with olive oil, Parmesan cheese, and a bit of dried sage or basil (basil works particularly well with this recipe). Go easy on the basil if you plan to further garnish the soup with it (recommended). Bake until cheese begins to brown at about 250 degrees (about 10 minutes).

Enjoy!

Related Posts:

What’s Cooking In SG’s Kitchen? Ryker Suicide’s Pumpkin Lasagna

What’s Cooking In SG’s Kitchen? Mimmi Suicide’s Vegan Chili With Guacamole

What’s Cooking In SG’s Kitchen? Ryker Suicide’s Mahi-Mahi Tacos with Red Cabbage Slaw, Avocado-Tomato Salsa and Pineapple Hot Sauce

Got Problems? Sex, Love and Relationship Advice From SuicideGirls’ Team Agony

by SG’s Team Agony feat. Perdita

Let us answer life’s questions – because great advice is even better when it comes from SuicideGirls.

Q. Hi, and first of all, thanks for bringing so much sunlight into my life! I forget how long I’ve followed your site, but it’s been constantly reassuring to know that not everyone is hung up on the (double) standards we’re surrounded by every day.

I’m torn. What should I do? Endure the misery until we’re better off and can be natural again? Or cut my losses and go back to being single, leaving her bitter and disappointed once again? Or even something else, like separate to let the air clear and then try again? (A lot of “agains” there.) Any advice or perspective would be most appreciated.

A: It sounds like there is a lot going on here and you seem to have a very clear understanding of the situation, however you need to make a decision. I do think you both need an outside and neutral mediator to help because it sounds like you want to make this work and you care enough to stick around, but you guys are constantly butting heads at this point. If you are able to seek professional help for this, I would highly recommend it, if more for your wife than yourself. A single suicide attempt is more than enough of an indication that someone is dealing with more than they can handle, and she is also clearly carrying baggage from her past relationship. If you’re worried about the cost, many states have options for people seeking help with mental health issues that do not have insurance or the means to pay full price, so I would seek those out to see if you qualify.

You guys are also in financial straights right now in the middle of one of worst economies in 100 years. Believe me when I say that working a job you’re burned out on is no fun, but neither is being homeless, or up to your eyeballs in debt. You also have the needs of a little boy to consider, and sometimes you have to take the job you don’t love because it provides what you need. You both need to suck it up to an extent, and, if you have access to better jobs, now is the time to get them. I understand that it can be frustrating and unfulfilling to work at a job you hate, but this relationship would benefit from structure and stability. As for your finances, you need to sit down, take a look at all the debt you have and figure out how to manage it, make a budget and stick to it. Once you get a handle on your finances and get into a regular routine, there’s no reason why you can’t pursue your interests (together and separately) as hobbies, at least in the meantime.

Ultimately every relationship takes work, and while this relationship may take more work, it sounds like something you are willing to do. So get some professional help, start discussing your issues on a regular basis and concentrate on improving your financial situation, that way you’ll be moving in the right direction for a healthier, happier relationship.

Perdita

Got Problems? Let SuicideGirls’ team of Agony Aunts provide solutions. Email questions to: gotproblems@suicidegirls.com

by Blogbot

This week “Krispy’ Lindsey and Alvin “Joey” Lindsey a.k.a. New Orleans good time hip-hoppers The Knux will join hosts Nicole Powers (SG’s Managing Editor) and Lacey Conner (our resident recovering reality TV star from VH1’s Rock of Love and Charm School) live in studio.

Tune in to the world’s leading naked radio show for two hours of totally awesome tunes and extreme conversation – and don’t let yo momma listen in!

Listen to SG Radio live Sunday night from 10 PM til Midnight on Indie1031.com

Got questions? Then dial our studio hotline digits this Sunday between 10 PM and midnight PST: 323-900-6012

And cyberstalk us on Facebook and Twitter.

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