by Brett Warner

As far as pieces of paper go, this one isn’t especially impressive. At 14 x 11 inches, it won’t fit in any common sized frame. Thick and off-white, its menacing black ink still glistens slightly in the light. The stamped, indecipherable signatures of the Provost, President, and the Dean rest at the bottom; My name sits in the exact center, in the same archaic font as the university and school title. “In witness whereof we have caused this diploma to be signed by the duly authorized officers of the University and sealed with our corporate seal…” No frill, no frou-frou flourishes – just cold, dead language. At $158,298.25, this boring piece of paper is the most expensive thing I may ever own. I keep it in a box underneath the basement pool table.

NPR reports that in June of this year, student loan debt in the United States exceeded credit card debt for the first time, peaking this summer at $830 billion. Public and private tuition continues to skyrocket each year, out-escalating inflation and household incomes. In the 2008, the percentage of student loan defaults rose from 6.7 to 7 percent in a single year. In the case of for-profit colleges that number rises to 11.6 percent (according to Bloomberg). Extended repayment plans of up to 25 or 30 years have become commonplace, and an entire generation of college graduates have found themselves dependent on high-paying jobs for their very survival – jobs that may or, most likely, may not be waiting for them. Had I the foresight to know how bad the job market would eventually get, or even just exactly how much money I would owe, I might have made some very different choices. But as it stands, this author is one of thousands with a very costly piece of paper gathering dust. Standing for hours on end behind a cash register five days a week, it’s very easy to wonder, “What was the point of all this?”

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by Star Padilla

Want a drastic reduction in the number of men who bug you with creepy advances? I highly suggest you invest some money in a fake engagement ring, or maybe take it to the next level and buy the double band.

I’ve had some people give me a hard time in saying, “You may possibly be cheating yourself out of finding your soulmate by wearing that ring.” In all honesty, I’m not looking to meet my Mr. Right at some random bar – that’s far from what I imagine meeting my husband will be like. And I don’t want to date a dude I meet at a bar I’m a regular at, since that’d be super inconvenient if things didn’t work out (I mean, who would get custody of the spot?)

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by AJ Focht

School is back in session and this is your chance to grab that nerdy guy (or geeky girl) that you missed out on last year. But before you rush in head first there are a few things you should know.

While Bob Suicide has been helping all you geeks get down with the right look (and smell!), I thought I would go a step further and offer tips for those of you who are perhaps contemplating dating a nerd for the first time. First of all, bear in mind the rules and rituals of geek bonding are very different from those that apply when you’re dating a member of the general population. Nerds tend to be a bit more, let’s admit it, eccentric than, well, normal people. What makes us nerds so great is that we fully commit ourselves to a project, or video game, or whatever – in the extreme. This can also be a drawback if you are not well versed in the ways of nerdom. Some of our habits, hobbies, and even speech can come off wrong if you are not privy to the way of the nerd.

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by Lisa Brady

Thanks to a new wave of reality TV shows like MTV’s Teen Mom and 16 and Pregnant, and ABC Family’s The Secret Life of the American Teenager, the issue of teen pregnancy is out in the open (and apparently a source of endless entertainment). But does anyone else find it incredibly ironic that ABC Family is showing a series about teen pregnancy?

In the past it was considered a grievous mistake to get pregnant before getting married. These days, with the 50% divorce rate and the prevalence of one-night stands (and unprotected copulation), it’s very common to have a single parent situation. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. If Gilmore Girls has taught us anything, its that single mom’s (or dad’s) rock – and can be super hot. And with the likes US Weekly and People rewarding teenage moms with magazine covers, it’s almost as if the mainstream media is actively encouraging the phenomenon.

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By Edward Kelly

It starts innocently enough. A woman with red hair and a nervous smile sits in a non-descript room where the lighting is perfunctory at best. Behind her the wall is textured and yellow-ish. The woman rifles through an off-camera plastic bag. She holds up a receipt showing that the product in the bag was purchased recently (if memory serves, the timestamp on the receipt read August 30, 2010, around 2:45 p.m.).

The video is eight minutes long and therefore above average for something on YouTube. I’ve described the first minute or so because, since I saw it, the woman in the video, Karen Alloy (a popular YouTube vlogger with the user name “Spricket24”), has changed the settings and the video is now logged as private. If the description above sounds downright banal, well, that’s because it is. In fact if it weren’t for the title I would’ve bailed on it after the first 15 seconds. But the title of this video is “How To Take A Pregnancy Test” and thus I am in it for the long haul.

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by Brett Warner

My younger brother used to play softball and during the games, I would wander about the nearby train tracks or bum around in the small playground. (My main concern that summer was whether Agent Mulder could really be dead — he wasn’t, though in retrospect it might have been wiser for my then favorite show to go out while it was still ahead.) One day, there was another young kid on the swing set and he had this small, red, egg-shaped video game on a key chain. It had a funny name and my fifth grade eyes glazed over as he explained how the thing worked. “These are gonna be the next Beanie Babies,” he promised. I think I probably told him that was stupid. Shows what I know.

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by Bob Suicide

Geeks in general are often characterized as the archetypal introverted boy: thick plastic-rimmed glasses, suspenders, and high-waisted pants.

(Sounds pretty hot to me!)

Just look at Crispin Glover’s talented portrayal of stammering and painfully timid George McFly. We’re the ones who stand in the corner of the dance hall; afraid to talk to girls. In movies like this, nerds rarely “get the girl” without some sort of “coolness” makeover to bring us up to speed with popular culture.

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