Murphie Suicide in Private Tutor

• INTO: Living freely, the wild.
• NOT INTO: Rude and/or unclean people, and sauerkraut.
• MAKES ME HAPPY: The sun, happy people, and dogs.
• MAKES ME SAD: General unhappiness.
• HOBBIES: I’m into all things good.
• 5 THINGS I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT: My family, my dog, sleep, flowers.
• VICES: Procrastination.
• I SPEND MOST OF MY FREE TIME: I work, then I sleep. Occasionally I go to class.

Get to know Murphie better over at SuicideGirls.com!

by Ryker Suicide

Last night I made a really yummy tomato bisque. It’s great served topped with your favorite garnishes (cheese, cracked pepper, croustinis, or fresh julienned basil!) and with baby grilled cheese sammies! It’s a perfect cold weather super food, and is easy to make. It also makes a great appetizer for fall/winter dinner parties served in a martini glass

Ingredients:

• 3 tablespoons good olive oil
• 1 1/2 cups chopped red onions (2 onions)
• 2 handfuls of baby carrots, chopped
• 3-4 cloves minced fresh garlic
• 2 pounds vine-ripened tomatoes, coarsely chopped (3 large
• 1 can diced tomatoes
• 1 1/2 teaspoons sugar
• 1 tablespoon tomato paste
• 1/4 cup packed chopped fresh basil leaves, plus julienned basil leaves, for garnish
• 3 cups chicken stock
• 1 tablespoon kosher salt
• 2 teaspoons freshly ground black pepper
• 3/4 cup heavy cream
• Garnishes can include all or any of: julienned fresh basil, a basil/Parmesan croustini**, shredded Parmesan, and/or fresh cracked pepper.

Preparation:

Heat the olive oil in a large, heavy-bottomed pot over medium-low heat. Add the onions and carrots and sauté for about 10 minutes, until very tender. Add the garlic and cook for 1 minute. Add the tomatoes, sugar, tomato paste, basil, chicken stock, salt and pepper, and stir well. Bring the soup to a boil, lower the heat, and simmer uncovered for about 45- 50 minutes, until the tomatoes are very tender and aromatic.

Add the cream to the soup and ladle it by serving into blender (or process through food mill or veggie mixer). Reheat the soup over low heat just until hot and serve with desired garnishes.

**Directions for Parmesan Croustini:

Slice a loaf of fresh French bread into small diagonal pieces, sprinkle with olive oil, Parmesan cheese, and a bit of dried sage or basil (basil works particularly well with this recipe). Go easy on the basil if you plan to further garnish the soup with it (recommended). Bake until cheese begins to brown at about 250 degrees (about 10 minutes).

Enjoy!

Related Posts:

What’s Cooking In SG’s Kitchen? Ryker Suicide’s Pumpkin Lasagna

What’s Cooking In SG’s Kitchen? Mimmi Suicide’s Vegan Chili With Guacamole

What’s Cooking In SG’s Kitchen? Ryker Suicide’s Mahi-Mahi Tacos with Red Cabbage Slaw, Avocado-Tomato Salsa and Pineapple Hot Sauce

by Darrah de jour

Republicans Meet Muslims Halfway, In Bed

If you remember, in my last column, I reported on the New Jersey Republican state senate candidate who relegated his Twitter account to a Joyce Brothers-style dating advice forum. He targeted us rambunctious women by advising us via tweet that if we want to keep our man, we should be “faithful, a lady in the living room and a whore in the bedroom.”

I don’t know about you, but I don’t need a 40-something real estate dude chiming in on what I do between the sheets. Or in the back seat. Not to mention, the idea of putting my own needs aside, in an act that is supposed to be about both partners’ satisfaction and connection (or simply for two or more hot and sticky bodies to reach nirvana via some nerve bundles) to serve the man solely. Seems like, how do you say it? Bullshit.

Unless your job is to get paid for sex – you probably want to enjoy it. And since when did a ring on your finger or a nice bouquet of flowers equal whoredom?

Scarier Than Who Killed Amanda Palmer

Malaysia recently made international headlines for starting a “club” not unlike your grandmother’s knitting circle. Only, The Obedient Wives Club teaches Muslim women to reinforce their role at home. National director Fauziah Ariffin stresses that “in Islam there are four things that wives must do to enter Heaven: to pray, to fast during Ramadan, to protect their chastity, and to be obedient wives – and it is often the fourth aspect that modern wives neglect.”

She goes on, “Husbands should treat their wives like first-class prostitutes.”

Huh? Wait, I’m sensing a common thread here. Basically, over in America, GOP national candidate Mitsch tells us we should be a whore in the bedroom to win our man’s fidelity. And clear ’cross town in Southeast Asia, women are taught, via this version of Islam, that they should – be a whore in the bedroom to win their man’s fidelity.

Ariffin continues, “Our wives provide men with top-level service. However, ordinary prostitutes can only provide good sex, but not love and affection which only a wife can provide.

“Hence, as wives, we must treat our husbands better. It’s not just in bed, but everything that a wife can offer. Optimise [sic] your role. If we provide our husbands more than a prostitute can give, then our husbands will not go out looking for it.”

OK, gotcha. So, not just any prosy* will do. It should be a top-level one. Because let’s not leave out classism. Escort party-people. The kind you and I would be. Not that other kind that the poor are.

Fauziah reasoned that obedient wives will not cause husbands to take their partner for granted, but in fact, it will make them better husbands.

“When a husband comes home and receives good treatment from the wife, they become better and more loving husbands. Why would they treat their spouse badly if they are treated well?” she said.

I would ask Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad that one.

Even scarier, OWC has launched in Singapore, Indonesia, Australia, Egypt, Syria, Jordan, Britain and France.

This didactic schooling of women, which is pervasive and dates back to whenever it was that witches were broiled and our new patron saint was supposedly a virgin, begs many questions. First off, I can’t help but wonder, why are women told to think sex is bad but harassed to ‘give it up’? Wouldn’t it be smarter to convince us that sex is wonderful, and then prove it patiently and methodically? And, if men are indeed so horny all the time, then why are we whores if we give them what they need in order for them not to ‘get it’ from somebody else?

Perhaps, it has something to do with his voracious sexuality spinning him into a state of utter nonsensical frenzy. This unique, untamed erotic animal roaring to be freed. Into as many different women’s anatomies as possible.

If so, then why are we spending so much time trying to tame women – who apparently have less sex drive than men do? And if sex is dirty, then women are closer to God by virtue of our virtue, so why are we not being worshipped like men are?

Crazy times. Roll with it, dude.

Oh! Ariffin also hypothesizes that, by wives following the above guidelines, rape and incest rates will lower – proving a total lack of understanding around why rape and incest actually occur: control, fear, cycles of violence. And societal breeding. A breeding of entitlement made worse by factions like this encouraging women should neglect their own needs and “service” their mates. (P.S.: A lot of men are visiting sex workers to be led around on a leash and done in the backside with a dildo. Let’s be clear – men often visit prostitutes to live out fantasies they can’t explore at home. I’m not saying wives should don a catsuit, but when we lower stigmas around sexuality in society, perhaps we will also lower rates of cheating. And the less we proselytize to women for exploring their inner sexual voice – maybe, just maybe – fewer women will use sex work as a means to discovering it.)

Sicker Than Secretary, But Not In That Yummy Conscious Way

In case you were itching to know… the men in Malaysia are encouraged to join the male version of the Obedient Wives Club. The Polyamory Club. Founded by Global Ikhwan Sdn Bhd – a multi-national conglomerate – the controversial Polygamy Club, which opened in 2009, persuades husbands to take more than one wife to satisfy their masculine desires.

Hold the phone. Women are encouraged to be obedient and servile to keep their man and men are encouraged to hunt for more wives? Yup. Roll with it. You’re just along for the ride. Right?

Or maybe…

Girl Zone Loan

Women, let’s stop being so fucking judgmental of one another. If we continue to allow men like this to dictate our morality, we will shrink our ovaries, lose our clitorises, have feet like lotus flowers and hang out in the kitchen more than the board room. We’ll walk around topless and ogled, yet handcuffed to chastity.

I say – say it loud. Say it proud. I like sex and I’m a woman. I won’t be put on mute. I won’t be turned into a meek sexless coward by a Fascist moral dictatorship. I am an erotic Goddess. Now, hubby, please rub my feet. I had a long day at work. And there are more of me than you in the workplace right now. And I make up 51% of the nation. And I’ve served you long enough.

*Prosy is slang for prostitute and was directly lifted from Secret Diary of a Call Girl with Billie Piper. Go rent it.

[..]

By Nicole Powers

In the late 1990s and early 2000s, General Motors’ EV1s were the Apple Macs of cars. Ahead of their time, they were only driven by an enlightened “different” thinking few, but those that did felt passionately about their high tech machines.

A fully electric plug-in vehicle with a range of between 70 and 140 miles depending on model, the EV1 was first introduced into the marketplace in 1996. Available in limited test markets on a closed lease-only basis (whereby no actual purchase was allowed), it was developed by General Motors partly in response to the California Air Resources Board’s requirement that the seven major auto companies in the US had to make at least 2% of their output zero-emission vehicles (ZEV) by 1998 in order to sell any cars within the state (with further graduated steps stipulated up to 10% in 2003).

Though grudgingly produced by General Motors, the vehicle was beloved by the few consumers lucky enough to rise to the top of the company’s reportedly vast waiting list. But it was likely a car that was never intended to succeed. General Motors seemingly put more effort into fighting the CARB mandate in court than meeting existing demand for vehicles or marketing the EV1 to create even more. It was therefore not uncoincidental that the demise of the EV1 occurred in tandem with the gutting of CARB’s ZEV rules. The EV1 program was officially cancelled in 2003, and a total recall was put in motion, with repossessed cars being not only compacted but shredded for good measure too.

A 2006 documentary, Who Killed The Electric Car, chronicled the crushing demise of this groundbreaking car. In it filmmaker Chris Paine highlighted the collusion of the auto industry, oil companies, and politicians, who all had a vested interest in seeing the electric vehicle die an untimely death alongside CARB’s environmentally prudent directives. Catching the zeitgeist, Who Killed The Electric was the third highest grossing documentary that year (Al Gore’s An Inconvenient Truth being the first).

However, a decade after General Motors presided over the funeral of the EV1, the killing of the vehicle has proven to be a costly mistake. With gas prices rising, Toyota filled the rapidly increasing fuel-efficient void with their hybrid Prius, which went on sale in Japan in 1997. Following its worldwide debut in 2001, Toyota have sold over a million Prius cars in the US alone, and the rest of the auto industry has been scrabbling to catch up.

With revenge being served on a platter less than a decade on, Paine and his documentary team were compelled to reexamine the fortunes of the electric vehicle in a follow up film. The first had centered on activists working from outside the industry, with this film Paine chose to follow a diverse group of instigators working from within. Revenge Of The Electric Car therefore features four EV evangelists (some of whom were more recently converted than others) who are attempting to drive the future of the automobile into the present: Bob Lutz (General Motors’ Vice Chairman up until May 2010), Elon Musk (Tesla Motors’s CEO), Carlos Ghosn (Nissan’s President and CEO), and Greg “Gadget” Abbot (a DIY electric engine retro-fitter).

SuicideGirls recently visited Paine at his ultra green home to talk about his cinematic “I told you so” and the electric awakening of a sluggish car industry that was in need of a shock. After checking out the 2008 Tesla Roadster parked in Paine’s garage, the irony was not lost that we were conversing about, and anticipating the dominance of, the gas-free vehicle in the heart of LA’s oil country amidst the pumpjack nodding donkeys of Baldwin Hills.

Read our exclusive interview with Chris Paine on SuicideGirls.com.

Plymne Suicide in Head In The Clouds

• INTO: Science, medicine, photography.
• NOT INTO: People.
• MAKES ME HAPPY: When sun is up!
• MAKES ME SAD: Loneliness.
• HOBBIES: Photography, cinema.
• 5 THINGS I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT: My friends, my cat, my camera, music, and Starbucks coffee.
• I SPEND MOST OF MY FREE TIME: Outside.

Get to know Plymne better over at SuicideGirls.com!

Got Problems? Sex, Love and Relationship Advice From SuicideGirls’ Team Agony

by SG’s Team Agony feat. Perdita

Let us answer life’s questions – because great advice is even better when it comes from SuicideGirls.

Q. Hi, and first of all, thanks for bringing so much sunlight into my life! I forget how long I’ve followed your site, but it’s been constantly reassuring to know that not everyone is hung up on the (double) standards we’re surrounded by every day.

I’m torn. What should I do? Endure the misery until we’re better off and can be natural again? Or cut my losses and go back to being single, leaving her bitter and disappointed once again? Or even something else, like separate to let the air clear and then try again? (A lot of “agains” there.) Any advice or perspective would be most appreciated.

A: It sounds like there is a lot going on here and you seem to have a very clear understanding of the situation, however you need to make a decision. I do think you both need an outside and neutral mediator to help because it sounds like you want to make this work and you care enough to stick around, but you guys are constantly butting heads at this point. If you are able to seek professional help for this, I would highly recommend it, if more for your wife than yourself. A single suicide attempt is more than enough of an indication that someone is dealing with more than they can handle, and she is also clearly carrying baggage from her past relationship. If you’re worried about the cost, many states have options for people seeking help with mental health issues that do not have insurance or the means to pay full price, so I would seek those out to see if you qualify.

You guys are also in financial straights right now in the middle of one of worst economies in 100 years. Believe me when I say that working a job you’re burned out on is no fun, but neither is being homeless, or up to your eyeballs in debt. You also have the needs of a little boy to consider, and sometimes you have to take the job you don’t love because it provides what you need. You both need to suck it up to an extent, and, if you have access to better jobs, now is the time to get them. I understand that it can be frustrating and unfulfilling to work at a job you hate, but this relationship would benefit from structure and stability. As for your finances, you need to sit down, take a look at all the debt you have and figure out how to manage it, make a budget and stick to it. Once you get a handle on your finances and get into a regular routine, there’s no reason why you can’t pursue your interests (together and separately) as hobbies, at least in the meantime.

Ultimately every relationship takes work, and while this relationship may take more work, it sounds like something you are willing to do. So get some professional help, start discussing your issues on a regular basis and concentrate on improving your financial situation, that way you’ll be moving in the right direction for a healthier, happier relationship.

Perdita

Got Problems? Let SuicideGirls’ team of Agony Aunts provide solutions. Email questions to: gotproblems@suicidegirls.com

by ExAddict

The first four were tight. Real tight.

It’s a late night sometime during the ‘90s at any one of the millions of households, college dorms and computer labs across the planet…Productivity is at an absolute standstill because much caffeine, Doritos, freewill and time have been surrendered to what was simply put, the greatest game ever.

Fast forward to today and an entire generation of gamers await the next chapter in the series. But like the adventures of Duke Nukem before it, this one may end up stuck in the design stages for a vaporware eternity.

The game was SimCity. Or should I say SimFuckinCity. The ingenious city building and urban planning series created by software company Maxis and designer Will Wright. Sadly, since January 14th, 2003 – the release date of the last true SimCity title – the series has been dead in the water.

Sure there have been newer interpretations and incarnations of the Sim brand, especially since the 1997 acquisition of Maxis by the giant gaming conglomerate Electronic Arts. Despite SimCity’s incredible sales success and cult following, gamers have been crying for the next edition for close to nine years. Yes, believe it or not, it’s been almost nine years since SimCity 4.

So what happened? Mainly, a ton of platforms, iPad this. Nintendo 3DS that. While the original SimCity and it’s four true sequels (SimCity 2000, SimCity 3000 and Sim City 4) kicked serious ass on PC and Mac for fifteen years, the arrival of powerful handheld gaming systems, and later the iPhone and tablets have meant a new audience for an old standard. Afterall, as the piss-poor Duke Nukem Forever proved having tempted fans for 15 years, if it ain’t broke, why fix it?

Thus a legion of first-time gamers and business users going portable are spending countless hours creating and exploring exciting and worthwhile cities in an essentially unchanged gaming environment. Recent releases of SimCity have been based mostly on SimCity 3000, a.k.a. the crown jewel of the Maxis empire, released in 1999.

Something deep within the development teams of Electronic Arts must be clinging to the assumption that good code can always be recycled. While recent remixed versions and deluxe editions of the best of the series stand to bring a flood of fans to this legendary world-creator, we still don’t have what we want – SimCity 5.

Some might be asking, what about The Sims? Isn’t that a logical sequel to the brand? Nope, not even close. Even though The Sims, Spore, SimEarth, SimFarm, SimTown, Streets of SimCity, SimCopter, SimAnt, SimLife, SimIsle, SimTower, SimSafari, and SimPark all offer the Will Wright brand of world-building and exercises in environmental simulation, nothing beats the very first time your city comes alive, the moment you power up the transformer to bring electricity to your city. And many of us have hundreds, if not thousands, of hours of game time to prove it

Besides, although The Sims is in fact the highest selling video game of all time, the engineers and architects hidden inside all of us clamor for a return to world-building, not romantic plot-lines involving debates over purchasing a new couch and nonsense gibberish conversations with neighbors. For that, we have reality.

And then there’s the matter of Civilization.

First released in 1991, Civilization 1 through 5 have consistently offered a new and expanding universe for fans of extended (and time-consuming) adventures that revolve around the gamer playing the role of deity. The last Civ title was released in September 2010 and for some hardcore players, a new PC or Mac chapter of Civilization often means a complete upgrade in system hardware.

Will SimCity 5 ever see the light of day? Hard to tell. In 2007, EA released SimCity Societies, billed by some as the theoretical next sequel, but not a true SimCity 5. A review in two words: It sucked. Focusing far too much on being a bastard hybrid of both The Sims and a childish version of SimCity 4, SimCity Societies left a bad taste in many mouths.

Core to the reason why we may never see another worthwhile installment of this gaming classic, designer Maxis let the series design rights slip to Tilted Mill Entertainment, so they could concentrate on EA’s Spore, an underwhelming creature-builder also inspired by Will Wright.

If it ever is to see a real release, SimCity 5 may be born through the decision in 2008 by Maxis to release the SimCity source code under a free software license. If there’s one thing the free software community knows how to do, it’s fork the fuck out of original code.

If the fifth chapter in the book of SimCity is to be written, it might be authored by a fifty-six year old Senegalese crop worker or a banker riding the subway booting Ubuntu.

Maybe it’ll be worth the wait.

Other recent gaming notes…

* Will the Angry Birds movie threaten to score big box office or go down as yet another example in the long history of video game to big screen adaptations that have totally flopped? * Ever since my Xbox 360 surrendered to the red ring of death, I’ve been putting off investing any more money in Microsoft for this generation of gaming. But Battlefield 3 (from EA) just dropped and may change all that for me. I’m sick of waiting for a PS4. * WWE ’12 (from THQ) for PS3, Nintendo Wii and Xbox 360. Demolition and the Legion of Doom have been added as legends and I can see myself picking this up for the deepest Create-A-Character mode in the history of gaming. Throw in Brock Lesnar and the return of the F5 and my dollars are done.