by Laurelin
Dating. I think we all know by now that I suck at it. I’m a tough girl to win over, and the odds of me scaring someone off by date three are pretty damn good despite the initial attraction. I’m going to be honest, I have been sampling what Boston has to offer lately and am having a damn good time with it — it’s summertime, what do you want from me? I’ve realized that keeping an open mind when it comes to guys has meant I have met a lot of cool people who I normally wouldn’t have gone for… I have also met a lot of idiots.
Guys, good lord, I know sometimes girls turn out to be a bit bonkers; especially girls like me who habitually come home a little drunk around 4 AM with a rip in their jeans and a half eaten cheeseburger in their purse. But I figure I may as well tell it like it is; it doesn’t matter how hot you are, it is totally possible to lose even the most captivated girl in ten minutes. Listen up guys. Help me help you, take heed of these simple rules, and then maybe we can all go get a margarita.
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by Laurelin
What defines a healthy relationship? People are always judging relationships, their own and other peoples, comparing them to those we see in real life, on TV, in romantic comedy movies. Is there really such a thing as a healthy relationship? I know that as a bartender I am surrounded by unhealthy lifestyles, so by default I think any relationship I find is most likely going to be unhealthy. I have this image in my head of the 9-5 types that gather at a few bars I’ve been to downtown, young professionals with their loosened ties and top button unbuttoned, holding a beer (only one, they have work tomorrow) and living their perfect lives. These are the kind of bars I run from, but some reason I feel like “downtown” is a lifestyle, a perfection in healthy relationships that I will never have.
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by Blogbot
To celebrate Cinco de Mayo, vintage style icon Dita Von Teese has put her own twist on the world’s favorite Mexican cocktail. As a spokesperson for Cointreau, the drink naturally includes the orange liqueur (Cointreau is a triple sec produced in Angers, France). But there’s also some more unlikely ingredients which give it a kick and a contrasting demure floral note.
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by Laurelin
Heartbreak. It happens to everyone, and people deal with it in different ways. I remember the first time I ever felt it, the impossible sadness and emptiness that just washes over your body in a wave when someone decides they don’t want you anymore. I was in high school, having dinner with my family and the phone rang. He always called around that time. We talked for hours every night. That night was different.
“You didn’t see this coming?” He asked. “L, school’s over. I want to be free for the summer.” I hung up the phone, wanting to scream and cry, throw the phone through the window…but I stayed silent. I swallowed it all, and in that moment I decided that that’s how I would get by. I walked calmly back to the dinner table, smiled and carried on. My parents never even knew anything was wrong. Inside, I was crushed and angry, outside, I was calm, cool and collected.
I didn’t date anyone else for two years, but eventually high school ended and college was a new start. I met someone, and it was a fairy tale. I still consider myself lucky to have known anything like that. It ended well enough, looking back, but it took me another solid two years to get passed that one as well. After we agreed to call it quits I just wanted to give up. It couldn’t be over, but it was, and it was next to impossible to move on. But, after college, just as before, I did move on. The next guy and I dated on and off for a few years as well. He was different then the rest. He was a bit controlling, but I was all too ready to accept the roll of housewife after spending the last few years drinking my face off in dark bars. I didn’t go out, just came home after work, crawled into bed, and loved him with everything I had. My friends didn’t trust him; I thought they were crazy.
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by Aaron Colter
Back in my post about Emerald City Comic Con, I highlighted Rexa a monster pornography art book by Jason “JFish” Fischer, and hoped I’d be able to preview some pages from his upcoming work. Well, Fischer was kind enough to send me a couple pages from a book he’s debuting at the Stumptown Comics Festival in Portland this weekend called Junqueland written by Robin Bogert. He says the story is about “a couple of monsters having tasty fun in a bakery.”
So . . . yeah. Check it out. Shit’s crazy, and as far as I can tell, about some dinosaurs fucking, but it’s probably much deeper than that. Or not. Whatever. Who cares, it’s rad.
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by Laurelin
When I first came up with the idea for this column, the name “Life Beyond the Bar Scene” just seemed perfect. The life I lead is so immersed in the service industry that I really can’t see past it right now; everyone I know in Boston I met at a bar. Literally, everyone. Everywhere I turn, it’s bartenders, servers, bouncers, barbacks, nightlife, my life. It wasn’t always this way.
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by Aaron Colter
This week I’m featuring artistic shit out of Portland, Oregon – the best city in America, but don’t fucking move here because it rains for eight goddamn months out of the year. Oh, and by the way, I hope you have a master’s degree and several thousands of dollars in savings, because the only thing a bachelor’s will get you in this town is a part-time job in a coffee shop as a barista-back to a thirty-three year old with a villain mustache straight out of a silent film, who has, apparently, been studying the art of java and thrift-store shopping since he was sixteen.
How charming is that shit, Portlandia?!
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